Known Anonymous
by xXxMusicNCookiesxXx
Summary: Sakura is a singer, but she is known as Known Anonymous. She finds out she is going to die in 100 days. They want to get closer. All she can do is hope. Hope that they see that she doesn't want them close. See her life in her eyes as she tries to go on singing as the anonymous girl she is. See her hurt, heal, and fall in love, while knowing the date of her death AkaSaku GaaSaku
1. Prolouge: Day 0

**This I a new story I thought of. If you don't know why I called her Known Anonymous, it's because her name is unknown, but she I known all over the country XD I have written songs, but they all suck, so I am just going to post a line or two in each song she sings (the reason why I didn't put in songs that are already made are: 1- copyright and 2-It seems fun writing songs XD). Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.**

_Prolouge:How it Started_

"_Listen boy," _I sang into the microphone, "_You are my first love, so don't go breaking my heart, my heart. Listen boy, you got me now, don't miss your chance."_

"That voice, could it be?" a voice said outside the small concert hall.

"Oh my god, it is! It's the Known Anonymous!" another girl said, "I just love her brown hair and blue eyes!"

_If only they knew who I was. If only they knew I was wearing a wig and contacts._ I finish my song and I begin to sing my latest one.

"_Boy, it could've been me. Boy, you chose her, now your heart is breaking. Boy, I won't shed a tear, not for you_" I sing before my eyes get hazy. _No, I have to sing! _That was my last thought. I feel my footing loosen as my microphone slips out of my hands. I feel myself fall to the floor, my wig still on. Everyone begins to murmur and shout. I hear the ambulance sirens and I feel myself being carried to the hospital.

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"Too bad, she had so much talent too," someone in a white coat had said. My eyes begin to flutter open. I saw my personal doctor who knew about my secret.

"D-doctor, what's happening?" I asked as loud as I can, but I barely managed a whisper.

"Ah, Sakura, you're awake. I wish for you to call the person you trust the most, preferably a relative, and tell them to come here," my doctor had said. I reach for the phone and think of who to call for. I couldn't call my father because he was a sadists and a drink-attic. I didn't have a mother I could turn too. I had friends, but all of them betrayed me not so long ago. I had no one.

"Excuse me, but I have no one to call, I am pretty sure you are aware of that," I told my doctor. He sighed before he continued.

"Fine, I am so sorry to say but," he paused to think of what he was going to say next, "Your sickness is worst then we had thought. You will be dying in 3 months from now." My eyes widen at what he said.

"B-But I am just sixteen! How, why?" I ask

"Like I have said, you have a hundred days left at most, starting tomorrow. Apparently, none of your fans have visited, so you can walk out without your wig. Go home right away and get some rest. When you're done, you should write a will or something."

I follow my doctors order as I walk out with my eyes as dead as it will ever be. My vibrant green eyes were dull and the spring in my step was gone.

I drive up to my normal house. No, it wasn't a mansion, like everyone else thought. It was a normal, one-story house. I walk in, ignoring the screams coming from my dad. I merely ran to my room when I heard footsteps. I jump onto my bed and cried. I had so much I wanted to prove. How am I supposed to prove it all in 3 months? When I couldn't sleep, I got out a journal and wrote on top, My Will, but the only thing I could think of was to be buried next to my mother, the only person who stood by my side the whole time.

Then I took out a new journal and wrote on the first page in the biggest letters I could manage, Last Three Months of Known Anonymous. I would begin keeping track of my life in the last three months of my life. Whether it's published or not, I would want the whole thing to be read in my funeral. I guess that was my next thing to add in my will: Read my journal, Last Three Months of Known Anonymous. I had no one to turn to, so it wouldn't matter if I was going to die in a couple months. No one will know I was gone. They will only know when Known Anonymous is gone. I drift off into deep slumber as I begin to think of what will happen in the next couple of months.

**There you go! How do you like it? If you can, help with ideas! I won't be able to come up with 100 ideas over-night so…By the way, this whole story will either be in journal format or first person, unless stated otherwise. If you want me continue please review, because I don't know if it's good or not. **


	2. Day 1: Who Am I?

**This Day is to tell you how much she dreads school. It also shows her daily life at her school. I know it's short, but I have to write ninety-nine more chapters or so! I hope you enjoy reading it!**

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><p><strong><em>Part 1: And so She was Hurt<em>  
><strong>

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><p><em><span>Day 1: Who Am I?<span>_

I walk to school, singing to myself. No one will care if I die. In fact, I don't have anyone to tell.

I walk through the doors as everyone starts to talk about me.

"Oh, she still hopes that big foreheads will be in style, huh?" I heard my former best friend say, purposely trying to make me hear. Her new best friend giggles at her joke.

"Good one, Ino. She will never be stylish," Karin said in the same volume.

"Karin, we all know that." I just walk on as if I didn't hear a thing. I always hear those words, but I never get use to them. No one notices that my eyes begin to sting. Maybe I am better off dead. No one cares about me, only the Known Anonymous.

_I am so pathetic. I am jealous of myself._

"She's so weird."

"Did you see her forehead?"

"Ew, gross!"

"Why don't you just die!"

All those words are what I heard each day. They don't know that they are getting their wish. They don't know that I come home to a beer bottle, smashing onto my legs. They don't know that I have scars on my now weak body from brutal abuse. They don't know, even with my head held high now, I fall asleep crying. They don't know that even when I smile, I am crying, breaking.

Someone sticks out their leg to trip me. My reflexes start up from dancing lessons as I side step with a twirl. Everyone gasps before they return to their mocking state.

"She thinks she's so cool with her weird moves."

"Man, I bet that's all she does."

"You mean try to impress us?"

"Pathetic!"

I just continue with my stride down the long hallway. I walk in the classroom and take a seat in the back, hoping no one will notice me. That's why I wear dark colors to school: to avoid attention.

"Loser!"

"Look at her clothes!"

"Man, she should be more like Ino. Why did she even hang out with her in the first place? She doesn't deserve a life!"

The bell rang after the last statement. The teacher said something about a transfer student. I acted like I didn't care. The Sakura they knew would probably be dreading this. But truthfully, all I want to do is greet him or her with a smile. I would want to welcome them. I would be first to greet them. But the Sakura they knew couldn't do this.

"The transfer will be coming, along with his siblings, next week. Everyone, treat him with hospitality!"

I am not myself here. The 'me' is gone. Who am I? They don't know.

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><p><em>Day 1:<em>

_What happened?_

_What happened to the old me?_

_Smiling, laughing, chatting._

_That's all gone now._

_I am lost._

_In an abyss of darkness_

_I am gone._

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><p><strong>So what did you guys think? Can you guys guess who the transfer is? It is kind of obvious from the last dialogue part. This is her daily life at school if you don't get why I wrote this. Please review!<strong>


	3. Day 2: Without Thanks

**I really like my past chapter better, but since it was thanksgiving soon, I would just post it, you know? And again, way to short -_- Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.**

_Day Two: Without_

"Class, today, we will be writing an essay about what you are thankful for!" the English teacher announced, looking mighty proud, before the class groaned.

"We did this in elementary school!"

"Are we going to cut out turkey as well?"

"Where are the color pencils?"

"Shut up! Just for that, the essay will be at the very least, three pages long! Give reasons and use the stuff you use in literature. Only two or three things to be grateful for."

"Hey, Hinata-chan, what are you going to write about?" I heard my past brother figure say, about three seats away. He gave Hinata _my _smile. The smile he used to reserve just for _me_. Now, all he does to me is hurt me.

"Ah, I-I am g-g-going t-to write a-about m-my f-friends and f-famliy, N-N-Naruto-kun" Hinata stuttered. I remember the time before Karin transferred here. Ino and I helped you with your stutter problem. As soon as Karin came and Ino tagged along, it came back. Especially after Karin threatened you. I stuck up for you, but apparently, you joined them, helping them back-stab me.

I stare down at my paper. Friends are what I would write about if I had any. My only family beats me to the verge of death. I don't have real freedom, being trapped like a cage bird. Education is ruled out because I can't focus when my dad had just abused me yesterday and I have knowledge that the next would be even worse. I barely have any food and my shelter is more like a hell house when I don't want to be there. There is always music, but would it be weird to write about that?

I begin to hum to myself, thinking of what to write about. I began to write whatever came to my mind. When I finished, I looked at the paper. Sentence after sentence, it seemed dark and depressing.

… _barely a shelter_

…_no freedom in my house_

…_love ones abandon you_

…_compared to my life_

…_Mother's love is gone_

I wanted to rip it apart, but I can't. This period is almost out. I would have to turn it in like this. I re-read it, glad I didn't put anything in the paper that goes to into detail. I see a drop on my paper. When have I started to cry? I wipe my tears, forcing myself to stop. I stare at the clock until it finally rings.

_What's the point of Thanksgiving if there is nothing to be thankful for?_

_Day Two:_

_What is Thanksgiving,_

_Without the turkey,_

_Without the Thanks,_

_Without the giving,_

_And most of all, happiness?_

_Nothing but a void_

_Of darkness_

_And_

_Bitterness_

**Meh, I like the past chapter best than this. This is an idea I had that wouldn't leave, even though I had better ones, but apparently, they never stay long enough for me to write down! –Sigh- I suck at poetry. I was trying to make a turkey face, but it was an epic fail XD. Anyways, please review!**


	4. Day 3: See Through

**Sorry for the late update! I was working on a science brochure for, well science, and a history brochure for history, and an English one-pager or something like that. And now I have to worry about Photoshop -_- Anyways, I got no ideas and the story can't go on without the transfer, so, yeah, don't blame me. POLL ON PROFILE! WHAT SHOULS I WRITE AFTER I FINISH A STORY! Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or have anything to do with the ownership.**

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><p><em><span>Day Three: See Through<span>_

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><p>"Hey, have you heard? The new student came early! He is coming today!" exited giggles came from the girls, about three rows in front of me.<p>

"Yeah, I heard! Did you know that he is supposed to be extremely hot?" another girl exclaimed.

_What's the point of being hot if all you do is act mean?_

"Yeah, yeah, I heard he's famous too! Maybe he's a model?"

_Rumors either help or break people._

"If he is, then his brother and sister must be hot too!"

_Not true… My brother was extremely handsome. He died too. Why did he have to die, not me, first? Why does everyone have to die?_

The teacher walked in the room, confidently, as the bell rang. She turned to the class, and didn't even crack a smile. "Class, I would like to announce that the transfer is coming today, since he changed his plans of next week. Next week, he will be working somewhere, and today, he wants to be introduced. Please welcome him." The glass broke into exited whispers as I just sat in the back.

"Quiet!" the teacher yelled, then turned to the door. "Enter, and introduce yourself."

The door opened and closed with a clack. There stood a redhead. He had sea-foam green eyes and he had the kanji for love on his forehead. He wore dark clothes, a black sweater and ripped dark blue, jeans. Although the dark clothes, his face, although emotionless, appeared as if he was the type to hang out with Sasuke and Naruto.

My heart clenched and those names.

He appeared confident, with his stride, walking next to the teacher. There was slight slouching, but not enough to make him look like he had no posture. He stood straight, but he did not look straight enough to look stiff.

"My name is Gaara Sabuku" he announced, not really caring, as the girls swooned.

"Sit next to me!"

"No me!"

"Gaara, pick me!" all the fangirls screamed for him as he just walked calmly down the aisles, looking at each seat as if they were auditioning for American idol.

_He won't sit next to me._

Finally, he looked at the seat next to me. I inspected him, he inspected me. Finally, our eyes met. His eyes were cold, yet they held warmth. His eyes clashed with mine, as if it were war.

He sat down next to me, as the rest of the class gasped. Naruto stood up and walked over to him

"Hey, you might not know, but she's the loser of the school. If you don't want to be made fun of, you can sit with Hinata-chan and me!" he smiled brightly at him, as if he was the best thing in the world, and looked at me as if I was dirt.

_What happened to our friendship? What happened to your promise to never hurt me, as I promised you?_

"No thank you," Gaara looked at him coldly. The class gasped once again. No one ever refused the blond. Whenever he grinned at someone, it looked so innocent, you just had to listen. But not anymore. I knew what was behind it. Maybe Gaara did too.

"Suit yourself, panda-bear," Naruto walked off. Gaara wasn't offended.

_How did he look emotionless?_

The teacher began teaching. Gaara began taking notes. I began writing in my journal. While I wasn't looking, a note appeared on my desk.

_**Why r ur eyes broken?**_

_**-G.S.**_

My heart clenched.

_Pain haunts me. Why r ur eyes broken?_

_-S.H._

He passed me another note.

_**U didnt say why urs is, so neither will I**_

_**-G.S.**_

I felt too tired to answer. So I didn't write back. About five minutes later, I received another note, but a longer one.

_**Your eyes are broken. **_

_**Your heart is broken.**_

_**What caused it?**_

_**Their broken**_

_**Like mine.**_

_**-G.S.**_

How could he see through me? Everyone I know can't. Why can he? He is no one special. Why did he choose me? Am I that broken to interest him? Who else noticed? My broken eyes. They only cause trouble for those who come near.

Little did I know, fate was taking its first step towards me.

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><p><em>Day 3:<em>

_Have I become so obvious?_

_Like an open book?_

_Can someone see through?_

_My penetrated walls_

_And see my broken eyes?_

_Can they see?_

_Through my shattered heart_

_And see my _

_Death?_

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><p><strong>As days go on, her dark tone will slowly go away. She's getting used to the idea of death. But who is this new person? Is he the first step to her fate? Please more reviews! Sorry for not updating fast enough! VOTE ON MY POLL IF YOU HAVE SPARE TIME<strong>


	5. Day 4: Who is?

**I felt bad for not clearing up what happened to her mother. And I realized Sakura's dad wasn't in here much. So this chapter, it might not have as much as angst, I hope satisfies you. And I know it's Christmas (BTW Happy Holidays!), but if you go back to Without Thanks, then it wouldn't make sense to jump all the way back. So here you go!**

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><p><em><strong>On the fourth hour of Christmas,<strong>_

_**An Asian girl gave to me,**_

_**One chapter of Known Anonymous and a Thank You!**_

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><p><em><span>Day 4: Who is…<span>_

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><p>"<em>It's your fault they died!" <em>

_**Daddy?**_

"_It's your fault! Your fault!"_

_**Why does my cheek hurt? Daddy? Did he…**_

_**Slap me?**_

"_Give back my wife! My son!"_

_**Did something happen to mommy and onii-tan?**_

"_I never liked you! I would've given you away if Suzuki just let me! I was fine with just one boy, but instead, she made me keep you!"_

_**What happened?**_

"_I-It's not my fault." __**Why is my voice croaking?**_

"_Don't deny it! It's your fault! Your fault they died in the car!"_

_**He hit me this time. Memories flooded back. Mommy was teaching onii-tan how to drive, but he was in the wrong line or lane or something like that. I fell asleep in the car, sitting in middle of the seat. I remember fluttering my eyelids open, and then mommy took of her seatbelt and jumped out of her seat to protect me. I heard her yelling at onii-tan, telling him to drive back. Onii-tan kept yelling back something about the wheel being jammed.**__ "Blossom for me" __**that was her last words.**_

_**I remembered that onii-tan was in 'critical' condition. They wouldn't let me see him. I waited outside the door, refusing to leave, even when they closed visiting hours. I fell asleep on the cold floor. I stayed there for two weeks, the nurses brought me food, since I was a patient too. But would mommy have survived if I had died? **_

_**When they let me see onii-tan, he wasn't pretty anymore. But I love him. I walk to my onii-tan, the one who always walked me to school, even if his school was the opposite direction. I remember the time when mommy had to leave, he would always read me a bed time story and he would always take me to the park, pushing me in the swing. I walk to him, and I wanted to cry. He looked at me. His eyes were sad, but loving. I broke down crying.**_

"_D…Don't cry… cherry."__** His voice was shaky. **_

"_Onii!" __**I straighten my posture, but the tears were still rolling.**_

"_Sakura…remember that… mommy and I love…you." __**The heart monitor was making the noise it does in movies. I was scared.**_

"_Don't leave, onii!"_

"_Sakura… don't let…dad abuse you…anymore."__** He looked at me sternly. It didn't suit his bubbly personality. I nodded. He always abused me when he was having a bad day, but every day, he called me useless.**_

"_Sakura…I never… thought I was…going to love…you like I did." __**I froze**_

"_What do you mean?"_

"_When mom came…home with news of a…girl… I was sad… I thought that I couldn't… teach a girl…anything. I despised the…idea of a girly…girl. But when mom came…home with you… in her arms… I fell in love…with you. When you grew up…slowly…I thought…it was just…brotherly love, but…I realized, along the…way…I really did fall…in…love…with you." The way he was slowing down in his words made me scared. _

"_Cherry."_

"_What, Onii-tan?"_

"_Good…bye…I love-" __**beep. He was gone. He is gone. I started screaming. I run out of the room, not believing he was dead.**_

_**I ended up in the park where he used to play on the swing with me. I sit down. I bawl my eyes out, when I heard a rustle. I saw my brother, all better. At first I thought it was a ghost. I never realized it as a hallucination. I refused to think it a delusion.**_

"_Onii-tan?"_

"_Cherry, good-bye. I love you."__** I saw him starting to float away. I run over to him. He was already far up in the sky.**_

"_I love you too, Onii-tan don't leave!" __**I yelled towards the sky, then broke down crying… crying…**_

"_Why couldn't you die with them, huh__**?" My father's booming voice broke me out of my thoughts, my memories. I accepted any of his pain he gives me. Maybe it was my fault. Maybe it was better if I-**_

-beep, beep-

I awoke, drenched in sweat. It was that dream again. I didn't have that dream since… I sighed. It was the day called Thanksgiving, and I had work to get to. I get dressed quietly, hoping to escape without a bashing. I didn't want to worry any one of my fans. I grab my wig, put it on, slipped on contacts, and snuck out of the house, starting the engine in my slightly old car.

I drove to the music industry building, sighing. I got out of the car and walked in, looking for him. When I saw him I called out. "Kakuzu-sama!"

"Anonymous, good to see you, are you okay since the concert?"

"Yes, and I am ready to do my duet."

"Thing is, Anonymous, it was cancelled. You can rest for today, and come back Saturday, is that okay with you?"

"Saturday? Is any other day fine? I have…plans on Saturday."

"Sure, Anonymous."

"Kakuzu, can I stay with you for the day?"

"Sure, but I will just be planning your next concert…" he trailed off. "About ninety days from today, I think it was eighty-nine, but I am not sure, you will be performing in America."

"Ninety?" my eyes grew wide. That's a week before I die. I nod at him.

"Kakuzu, I want to tell you something."

"Sure, Sakura, what was it?" he rarely used my name.

"Kakuzu, the day I left the hospi-"

"Hold that thought, Sakura. I was going to meet a couple of friends from elementary. You're a sophomore, right? They should be around your age, sophomores, juniors, seniors, and one freshman. Do you want to meet them on Sunday?"

"Uh… sure, Kakuzu."

"Anyways, what did you want to say?" he looked at me curiously.

"Um… I wanted to say… that I am thankful for you!" I hug him. I don't want him to be worried. No one should be worried about one death. No one should ever pity me. No one shall care for Sakura Haruno, but for Known Anonymous. For some reason, I felt a disapproving stare. It wasn't from Kakuzu, and since I had a dream last night, I felt like it was my brother. I was scared. What if Aniki doesn't approve?

Kakuzu seemed surprised at my action. Then he patted my head. "Of course," he mumbled, "I am your father figure, aren't I?"

"No…" I trailed off. "You are not my father figure…because…"

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"You bitch! Stop escaping each day! I am tired of you always coming home and out!" This is not home, this is a house. This is not my home.

"I am sorry, father."

"Sorry won't fix anything! All you do is mourn over deaths and cry. When you were little, you couldn't stop screaming 'Daddy! Daddy!' Where's my reward for taking care of you, huh?"

"I said sorry." I will never call him dad. He was never my dad. He slapped me, harder than ever before. I don't let out a whimper. I wouldn't give him the satisfaction. No way will I ever give him what he wants, not ever again. I won't do anything to please. I don't need to. I don't need him, but he needs me. Because…

He's not my dad, he's my father.

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"You are not my father figure…because… you are my dad." I finished, whispering, not sure if Kakuzu heard. He doesn't need to hear. He already knows.

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><p><em>Day 4:<em>

_Who is your father?_

_Is it your blood,_

_Or is it someone who cares?_

_Someone who abuses,_

_Or someone who hugs?_

_Who is your father?_

_And_

_Who is your dad?_

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><p><strong>Happy Holidays! Reviews are a gift any writer would love! <strong>


	6. Day 5: Just Maybe

**I had to edit this a lot, trying to make it sound more like the other chapters, but it may not be… like the others? I am trying to keep track of the events that happen, so I am either going with the year being 2012 or 2016 for certain reasons. It might take me a while to finish, but yeah. I forgot that this is supposed to take place in Japan, so they have no reason to celebrate thanksgiving XD but let's just say that Sakura goes to a multicultural school (I got the idea from my cousin's school, even if she lives in Arizona!) Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto**

_Day 5: Just Maybe_

Black Friday. The day friends go shopping together. Just a year ago, me and Ino would be laughing together, Tenten would be steaming mad, and Hinata would be giggling slightly, shyly, sweetly. Just a year ago, we would be together, laughing about Naruto's antics. Just a year ago-

"Look, Karin, it's the freak!"

"Wow, haha, Ino, who knew she actually shopped!"

It was them. I knew I should've shopped for my own clothes first. Instead, I went to look for Known Anonymous clothes first. I face my former best friend and our past enemy. I looked at their taunting eyes.

"Look! Who knew she knew how to dress like a slut!" Ino said, rather loudly. No one looked our way.

"Wow, look at the color! I never knew she knew the color yellow and white!" Karin laughed, flipping her hair. I knew she was trying to provoke me. Just like she always tries.

"No, I had no idea either! Maybe that's why she never had any friends!" Ino laughed along. That made me want to cry. She said the word never. She might have never been my friend.

And then, for the first time in years, I heard inners voice again. The voice that shows how I am truly feeling. The voice that shows what I really want to do, and tells me what I already know and think. She is the true me. If I lie to myself, Inner would tell me what I am really feeling. But, she disappeared because I became her, I didn't lie to myself; I didn't act like someone else. If she came back… I am just like who I was like before. I am not myself. I am not who Sakura Haruno is.

**She was never your friend.** **She never liked you. **

_That's not true._

**She wishes for your death.**

_No she doesn't!_

**She dreads you.**

_Lies!_

**You know it's true**

_She… She used to be my friend._

**No, she did't used to be your friend, she pitied **_**and**_** used you. You hate pity, and you hate manipulators. **

"What a freak!" Karin pushed me back,

"Look at that cleavage shirt!" Ino threw a shirt after examining it. **Look at what you are wearing, Inner sneered.** _Please… Don't say anymore…_

"What does she have to show, anyway?" Karin laughed.

"What are those, size AA?"

**Tell them off, don't let them make fun of you.**

_I… I can't. Ino is my friend._

**She isn't, she made fun of you, and your chest is the same size as her.**

_But she's my best friend. I can't talk back to her._

**She is not. She's not even a friend.**

"Look at her, she's fucking ugly!"

**You are not ugly.**

_But she said I was._

**Don't sway so easily.**

"Hey, stop making fun of her!" I turn, to see a girl with four spiky pony tails. Ino and Karin glared at her, called a few names, and left. The blonde girl looked at me, smiling brightly. I think she was one of the new kids at school.

"Hey, my name is Temari! Nice to meet you!" I look at her with dead eyes.

"I am Sakura Haruno. I warn you, I am the freak of the school. If you befriend me…"

"None sense! What's so bad with you! You look awesome!" I stared at her with curious eyes. She obviously doesn't know what she deals with.

"I…" I said, almost happily, before I remembered who I was, "I hope you don't get made-fun off."

"Why? Why are you made fun of anyways?"

"Well for starters, my hair is pink, I love black, I have a big forehead… hm… what else? Oh, and I got suspended from punching those two most popular girls to protect my friend who left me." She just grinned wider.

"I like you. Come on, dump those clothes, we are going to buy you some real clothes!" she grabbed my arm and pulled my arm. I blinked. I almost smiled. Then I remembered. I couldn't get close to anyone. No… If I do, and if in anyway, they manage to get close and like me, they will be hurt when I… leave.

"I…I'm sorry, but I can't hang-"

"Hey you could come to my house next week!" she smiled at me. A genuine smile. A smile that hides nothing. A smile that I haven't seen shot at me for months. "We could have a slumber party! We could do our hair and then make fun of those preppy girls who make fun of people, and judge which people are nice and which are sour. You could tell me a lot, since I haven't been around enough!"

She sounded so happy to be with me. To hang out with me. To be near me. I found myself smiling along with her. I might not even know her name. But… just maybe… if fate has allowed it… I have made a new friend.

_Day 5:_

_Just Maybe,_

_Through my Tainted Heart,_

_And my Tired Eyes,_

_Just Maybe,_

_Through Fate and Destiny_

_Or perhaps Coincidence,_

_Just Maybe,_

_Through the help of an Angel,_

_Or by Selling my Soul to a Devil,_

_Just Maybe,_

_Perhaps,_

_In the Dark Days,_

_Of Dawning Death,_

_Just Maybe,_

_I have made a New Friend_

**I tried to make the poem longer. How do you like it? Or do you like the short and sweet (or dark) type of poems from before? Or do you not really care? This day (black Friday/ day after US Thanksgiving) is also Labor Thanksgiving day in Japan! I just figured that out! Oh, and you see that Sakura is in denial about Ino not being her friend anymore. Please review!**


	7. Day 6: Selfish Tears

**I hope this is similar to the other chapters too. I used to love reading the meaning of flowers from library books. But that was a while ago, so I vaguely remember some of the meanings. I was also surprised at how fast I got 4 reviews. Usually it would take at least a week, so I feel all special now ^_^ But seriously guys, I love all of you. I will try to update at least once a week from now on, but it may be difficult for me, since I have other stuff I have to do –dance, band, and sometimes soccer, basketball, and badminton with my dad. He is at risk of diabetes, like I will be when I get older. I will stop babbling and go on with the story.**

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><p><em><span>Day 6: Selfish Tears; Selfless Tears<span>_

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><p>I placed a lotus on my mother's grave. Ino used to teach me what flowers mean. Their secret meaning. Just like this lotus with the meaning of purity –never touched by the impure, not even my father. Seen with the light, and hidden from darkness. She was always smiling, always fair.<p>

The sun was rising, as I sat down, in front of tombstone. Today was her favorite day. The closest day to Thanksgiving that she would come home from work and spend time with me and my brother. She would always take us out somewhere, and at night, she would place me on her lap, telling me a story about a young princess with pink hair and emerald eyes. "She was a good fighter," I remembered what she told, "She didn't want to be a princess, but help her brother, the prince, fight in the war." That memory faded away as another faded in.

"_Cherry Blossom," _she would murmur in my ear, _"Cherry Blossom, remember that Thanksgiving is the day to be thankful. Christmas, New Year's, and any other day doesn't compare to this holiday."_

"_**But mommy, what can be more important than candy?"**_ I would ask, thinking about Halloween. She would laugh, and say _you'll see, sweetie._ I know what she means now.

Every Saturday after Thanksgiving, from the day of her passing, I would get up before the first ray of light, to visit my mother and brother. Every single memory I have of them been hazy, but here, I would rest till the first star in the night sky to shine, remembering their sweet laughs. What did they do to deserve death?

Do they have any idea how much I miss them? How much I have cried for them to be with me?

I got up and walked to my brother's grave:

_**Dear Son and Brother and Friend to all**_

His name was fading off of the tombstone. That's all it said on my brother's tombstone. We could not afford anymore written on it. I could only vaguely remember his name now. I placed a red tulip on his, which stood for true love. I know I am too young to fall in love, much less for my brother. But my love is true, it's real, and will never fade. At least, that's what I hope. I laid down in the grassy shade of a tree. I longed to be the tree, full of color, being really interesting, unlike me. I am dull, even with my pink hair and emerald eyes.

**You are not dull, honey. You are full of life. We're sexy and we know it!**

_Inner, I _was_ full of life. I withered away, just like a cherry blossom; dying after a moment of bloom._

**You just need someone to talk to! I bet you will be back to your old self in no time!**

But I knew Inner was lying for my sake. My old self was dead. Gone. It just vanished, no traces left behind. I wondered why that cheery blonde girl approached me. Unknowingly, I fell asleep in the cool shade, thinking about how I would last the next couple of months. I silently cried for myself.

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><p>I woke up to a beautiful sunset. It was mesmerizing, beautiful, and complete. The clouds were different colors; pink, purple, light blue, orange, and gray. It made me think of Shikamaru. Sure, he didn't betray me, but he started avoiding me a bit, being less playful, and having polite manners around me. We would never go cloud or star gazing anymore.<p>

That's when I noticed a certain redhead, just a couple meters away from me. He was kneeling at a grave, eyes closed. He looked so desperate, as if pleading. I was in no shape to comfort him. But I wanted so badly to walk up to him, to say it's okay, no matter how long ago the person he's praying to have been gone. Suddenly, his eyes, hazel eyes, snapped toward me, his eyes still desperate, but changed rapidly to a stoic and cold pair of eyes. He then walked away.

I couldn't help but walk over to the graves he was standing in front of just recently. I walked over to them, and my heart clenched. There was the same boy, just about a decade younger, with two loving parents, in a photo frame. They were trapped in time, smiling together. I looked at the engraved words on the tombstone.

"Akasuna," I unconsciously muttered.

**You're just curious cause he's hot, Inner joked, trying her best to smirk, just for my sake. **I just ignored her.

Suddenly, I felt selfish. I was moping about my death, yet, someone else can be suffering too. No, not can be, someone else will be suffering as well. It's not just me. I, myself, am not the only one in pain. Sakura Haruno is not the only one in pain.

Pain.

Obviously, many other people are feeling pain, people who don't deserve it. Whether I deserve it or not, there are plenty of other people who are crying over loved ones and for themselves. Who would cry for me? Who mourns for me?

Nobody.

I never cried for anyone else, but myself. Just like the song that I sang in the concert hall: '_Boy, I won't shed a tear, not for you.' _Now that's different. I will shed tears for other people.

I shouldn't cry for myself, especially since it won't hurt anyone else around me. I am on my own, and no one is going to cry for me but me. There is no way I could hurt anyone. So why cry? Why cry when you have no one to hurt? Why cry when no one cares? Just smile, and don't let anyone know. They will still be happy, and that's good enough for me.

"Good luck," I whispered to the redhead, even though I knew he won't hear me. "You're not alone." And for once, for the first time, something other than selfish tears rolled down my cheeks. Tears for someone else.

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><p><strong><em>Selfless Tears.<em>**

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><p><em>Day 6:<em>

_Was I so selfish?_

_Just thinking about myself?_

_Other people are out there,_

_And Yet,_

_I dare to cry,_

_Cry for myself_

_I vow on this Journal,_

_I will change._

_No longer, will I cry_

_Selfish Tears_

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><p><strong>While writing the past chapters, I kind've felt that Sakura was a bit selfish about her death, not thinking about if others that are suffering the same thing as her. But what sixteen year old wouldn't cry for themselves, knowing that they had, now, 94 days left? But that's not the point. Sakura, in this story, is so strong, yet so weak. She is partly who I want to be and partly my flaws. It's just that she realizes it sooner than I will ever realize. Please review!<strong>


	8. Day 7: Why Does?

**Disclaimer- I do not own Naruto**

_**Day 7: Why Does**_

"Come back in here, you little runt!" a voice called from inside the house. I don't answer back. I just get in my car and drive away.

I had all intention in going to the meeting my dad told me about. Not my father, my dad. Kakuzu. I had all intention in going to his house and meeting his high school friends. But something made me take a couple of turns away from the GPS direction.

I ended up in the park I always played in. The one where I spent laughing and crying most of my childhood –I got made fun of my pink hair and big forehead here, I met Ino here. I played with my aniki here, and this is where I ran to when he died.

I sat on a swing and think about all that has happened. I don't know how long I sat there, and I don't remember what I thought of. I just sat there, swinging a bit.

"Why are you crying?"

My head snapped to the person in front of me. I was already facing him, but I don't know how long he was there for.

"Was I crying?" I questioned myself out loud, touching my wet cheeks. I cursed under my breath. Once again, I was crying selfish tears. I try stopping them and calming them down.

I looked at the man with a melody for a voice. His face was full of piercings and his hair was bright orange. He was tall, and his face was emotionless. Even in the darkness of the skies, I could see how his eyes were glinting with something, like he was trying to playful, but he knows the sadness I felt.

Just like when I was popular.

I don't miss making fun of people, but I do miss my friends. Whenever I remember how cruel I was, I wanted to cry. I realized that he's been standing there the whole time. I immediately get up.

"If you want the seat, you can take it." I was about to walk away, but the stranger grabbed my wrist and pushed me back down to my seat.

"Stay." He sounded like he was unsure of himself. It sounded like he wanted to comfort me but didn't know how. But that couldn't be right; no one would want to take care of me. "You should stay."

He took the swing next to me and just sat. We sat in silence for a couple of minutes, but it wasn't the awkward silence. I could still feel the tension, but it was more comfortable than when I sit next to other people.

After those couple of minutes, I don't know what happened. We just started talking. It went from hobbies, to school. It went from school to sports. It went from sports to books. Something just… happened. We may have spent seconds, minutes, maybe even hours talking.

I just felt like I could just… trust him. I ended up talking about my past. I told him almost everything besides about my death. I don't know why I told him, but it just seemed to blurt out of my mouth.

He didn't say any condolences about what happened. He didn't say he was sorry. And that was the best part of it. It hurt even more when they way that. They pity you, and they say sorry as if that was the worst that could ever happen.

"My best friend died, too," he said, "I may have a lot of friends, but they are not him. You could never replace anyone. Especially him. He was two years older than me, but he was always the naïve one. He always smiled, and almost never grinned, but the way he acted was different between his warm smile. The only thing I could not figure out was why he never talked about his mom or dad."

I almost shrieked. I almost screamed. But I had to be sure of one more thing. I did not listen much afterwards, but only one thing was running through my mind.

_Why does my past follow me? Why does my past shadow over me?_

"I actually came to this park because I skipped meeting with my friends. I don't really regret it, though. You should hang out with us sometime. You seem like a good person," I heard the man say. I realized I did not know his name. But something made me not ask.

"Yeah, I might." I pondered if I should ask one more question. I ended up staying for a couple more minutes, or perhaps an hour. I had no idea, really.

"Hey, your best friend, what's his name?" I finally asked. He looked at me, and for a slight second, I saw pain flash through his eyes. It cleared quickly though.

"Nagato Haruno." He answered the answer I had suspected.

"Hey, I got to go, I will see you some other time, okay?" I got up before he could answer, and walked to the car.

"Hey, what's your name?" He called after me. I turned my head back, but I almost saw my brother in him. I blinked a couple of times, clearing up my vision, revealing the orange haired boy that was always there.

"Sakura Haruno." I got into my car and left the park. But I haven't left my past.

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><p><em>Day 7: <em>

_Why does it follow me?_

_Why does it go over me like darkness?_

_Why does it bathe over me like light?_

_Why does it keep coming back? _

_Will it ever leave?_

_Why does it?_

_My Past_

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><p><strong><strong>*READ*READ*READ*READ*READ*READ*READ*READ*READ*READ*READ*<strong>***READ*READ*READ*READ*READ*READ*READ*READ*READ*READ*READ******READ*READ*READ*READ*READ*REAd*****

**I am so late! But I have a reason! I worked on the last two days, a couple day before that, and a day I have no idea will appear on my PHONE because the computer I am using to type this is at risk or a Trojan (huge virus) so I only when I need to. But now I need your help. I want you guys to review how you want this to end (Personally, even if I wrote three versions, I prefer she dies, so there could be an epilogue, but YOU have the power) You can vote on coupling of any Akatsuki (besides Kakuzu, he's her dad :P) or Gaara or Kankuro (most unlikely, but you'll see why) You can vote if you want her to die (this one is written the best so far) live (warning: SPOILER- if she lives, others may not) or suicide (my LEAST favorite one) You could vote on who you want her to make up with, and there will only be six, and it can be any of the Konoha Twelve. That's all! Thanks for reading! Ja Ne!**


	9. Day 8: I Wonder

**OH MY GOD! I AM SO SORRY I HAVEN't UPDATED! I am so sad that I couldn't use a computer uless for school purposes (in the stupid school library won't let me use fanfiction!) My dad's computer is working, but the internet is sooooo slow! I won't update as often as I did befor,e but I WILL finish this story, no matter how many computers I have to go through!**

_**Day 8: I wonder (Darkness)**_

Monday. I just have to remember to get up every morning, but every Monday, I seemed to alarm would go off, and my eyes would open, staring at the ceiling. Nothing went through my head when that happened. I was as close as to dead as you can get. Sometimes, I would hear my dad screaming for me to shut off the alarm in a distant voice, and others, I jump up from fright he would hear, just to realize he was past out in the kitchen floor once again.

I wonder if he remembered how he treated me before my mom died.

"_Daddy! Daddy, look, I caught a firefly!" _**the adorable pinkette ran to her father with enclosed hands, careful not to crush the lightning bug. **_**That's not me, though. No, it can't be me. Not when the person who seems identical to my father was smiling so gently. **_

**The pink haired child laughed, opening up her hands to show her 'daddy' the bug when she was finally in front of him, only for the bug to fly away. The child looked surprised, and her eyes watered, sad she couldn't show her daddy she caught it with her own hands. If he was in a good mood, the little girl would be held gently, but if he was in a bad mood, well… a lot of tears would have sprung.**

"_Ah, Sakura-chan!"_ **the man that was so identical to the man I called father smiled at the small girl. **_"That was amazing! Too bad Suzuki wasn't here to see that." _**Suddenly, an older red haired boy ran up to the man and the girl, oanting and calling "Sakura! Sakura! Wait up!" **

**The man was chuckling, patting the scruffs of pink and put his arm around the boy with red hair once he was in front of him.**

"Bitch!" a voice awoke me from my morning Monday dream. "Turn off the damn alarm! Or do you want me to drag your ass up here!" Tears sprung from my eyes. I couldn't remember the dream. I remebered it was one of the past, a time when I was happy, but I couldn't remember what. I wonder if I could just stay here, forever. I would stay here, and no one would find me, look for me. I would be forgotten. No more. No more anything…

"_Bitch! Just go and die in hell!" _**Confusion ran thorugh my veins. I was in pain, but I wasn't hurt physically. **

"_But daddy, I just wanted to show you my art project!" _**I cried, as he spat out, **_"Stop bothering me with your crap while I am working, Sakura! I am done with your shit!" _**Tears ran down my cheek, before I realized he was about to hit me. I flinched, but didn't dare move. But the blow never came.**

"_I-I'm sorry, Sakura," _**he said it,but he didn't sound that sorry. H esounded guilty. Guilty because he thought of mommy. I looked too much like her, he said. **_"Father," _**brother was also in front of me. When did he jump in front of me? What was happening? **_"Nagato, I am so sorry!" _**he cried. **

"_Father! Pull yourself together!"_** brother never called daddy father. He always called him '**_Dad'_** especially when I am around. Sometimes, though, I hear him talking with mommy about daddy with the word father.**

"Bitch! Don't make me come down there!" he interuppted me again. This time, I clearly remembered the dream. Both dreams. Mom was traveling so much because of her job, but Aniki was always protecting me. It was ironic how when you die, your life flashes through your eyes, and how I am having those moments, but slowly.

_I wonder what would happen if Aniki was still alive. I wonder if father would still abuse me. I wonder if it was just Aniki who stayed alive. I wonder if it was just my mom. I wonder how different my life would me. I wonder if he truly loves me at all._

I shook my head, which was odd since I was lying down on bed. He couldn't have loved me. Besides, I have Kakuzu for a dad, I don't need my father. But I couldn't help but wonder why my mom loved father so much.

_Suddenly, the orange haired boy came to my head. I wondered how he knew Aniki. He was around my age, but Aniki was in high school when I was in elementry school. I admit, I was immature for my age, as when I was 8, I react as a 5 year old, but that mean when he died, the orange head could only be 10 if he really goes to my school. And he was best friends with aniki? I wonder, I just wonder, if any of my questions will be answered in these 100 days._

"Bitch!" The door swung open, showing a red-faced father. But even when he smacked me off my bed, and took out a hanger to smack my arms, I couldn't pay attention to his curses.

_**But then again, what are the chances I will meet him again?**_

_Day 8:_

_I wonder the times of past_

_I wonder the present_

_I wonder the future_

_But nothing goes on for the future_

_If I wonder on, all I see is the dark_

_But maybe I can wonder_

_Maybe I will get some answers_

_Would it be better to or to not?_

_Should I wonder?_

_Or perhaps it is best I stay in the dark?_

**I already aplogized, but I am so upset with my computers! Not one single one worked for me until, what, 4 days after my birthday? I mena, if I can update on my iphone, then I will update much more often, since I suppose iphones cannot get virisus, but I'm so freakin SORRY! (If anyone of you have the time, I would like you to vote on the poll for which Sakura Crossover I should write next) I had to put that somewhere, but I didn't know where and now I am groveling in my knees for forgiveness, while the scrape I got from dodgeball burn and I cry in sorriness and pain. Reviews? For my birthday?**


	10. Day 9, Part 1: No Longer

**Just a little thing I wanted to add before I actually put up the real chapter. I will completely be back when something ships back to my house... something to fix my laptop I guess? I think it will take 2 or 3 weeks :P Then I will be updating more often! Now with that good note, enjoy!**

_**Day 9 (part 1): No Longer**_

I skipped school. I couldn't help but leave that dreaded place. It hurt to see people who I used to care so much about, who used to care so much about me. I wanted to see them happy, but they wouldn't be happy with me there unless they hurt me. They smile when they make fun of me, but that's the only time they would actually smile when they see me. They used to smile so much when I was with them.

**Stop moping and hurry up to Kakuzu! Your duet is today!**

I sighed. She was annoying, but I don't have any time to myself to actually pity myself thanks to her, so I guess she was helping me. While I write, this, she's screaming about how she's not annoying. I grabbed my clothes to prepare for my little duet.

It was something most girls call cute. Something that was bright, long, and had nothing bleak. So unlike my life. Bright, how could it be? My life was shortened to less than a year, and nothing but darkness. If someone called me cute, it would've been out of pity.

**Well, aren't you optimistic?**

"Shut up," I whispered under my breath. She almost smiled, not that I could see her. I could feel her slight shift in moods. I didn't know why she was suddenly happy though, for I just yelled at her.

I walk out of my room, when I almost cursed myself. I heard my father yelling at the phone. If I went down now, he would definitely hold me back from going.

**I told you to wake up earlier.**

"Didn't I tell you to shut up?" I murmured when her mood lightened a bit again. I sighed. I retreated to my room, as I stuffed some stuff into a small backpack, including my wig, spare keys, and a water bottle. I opened the window, the oh so small window, that wouldn't fit anyone else that wasn't a child or myself. I was small, short and underweight.

I put a single leg through my window, sticking my head out lightly, as I realized someone was watching me. It was a blonde, with side bangs covering their face.

"Hey there, need some help?" he asked me cheerfully.

"Sure…?" I questioned, not being fully sure of myself. My room's window led to the backyard, so what was this man doing here? He walked over to me and laughed when he saw my backpack.

"So your running away?" he asked me, before helping me out of the small window.

"What are you doing here and who are you?" I asked, glaring at him slightly once I was out of the window.

"Is this how you treat someone who helped you?" he laughed it off, "besides, I asked first."

"Well, you're in my house."

"Outside really."

"You're in my backyard," I corrected. He shrugged, as if it wasn't important.

"Point taken. But I still asked first… What did I ask again?" he scratched his head. I looked at him curiously.

"Do you have ADHD?" I asked. His eyes widened.

"How did you know?"

I almost laughed. He reminded me of Naruto. But I regained my composure. I wouldn't let him get close to me, nor would I get attached to him, not when I know that I am going to die.

"I need to go now, good bye. I recommend you leave this backyard before I call the police." I warned him.

"You wouldn't do that!" he almost exclaimed, before I covered his mouth.

"Shh! I am leaving now. I expect you to be gone by the time I am gone, got it?" I glared at him menacingly. He nodded as I let go of his mouth and climbed over the short wired fence and got in front of my car. I grab my keys as I reach inside my backpack, and got ready to unlock it before he called out something to me.

"Deidara Iwa!"

I looked at him confusedly.

"You asked for my name! My name is Deidara Iwa! You're Sakura Haruno right? I hope to see you again at school!" he waved good bye. I smiled to myself, before getting into the car. I drove off without a word.

I tried to keep him off my mind, but the more I thought of him, the more I compared Deidara to Naruto.

While driving to the industry, the memory is foggy, but I believe that I was smiling. As much as I tried to prevent it, he's too much like Naruto, and looks too much like Ino, to not smile. I promised myself, however, not to let anyone in, so even if I wanted to, I will do all I can to make sure I don't get close to anyone else. I have to cut lose all ties and make sure I don't rebuild or make any. It's going to be hard, but I will work hard for the results I want. Till my last breath, I will work hard to make sure no one cries as hard as I did when Okaa-san or Aniki died. I just hope I am strong enough to do that.

100 days is a long time after all, and meeting someone with such bright smiles is going to be hard to keep away.

_Day 9, part 1:_

_With a smile so bright,_

_It's hard to resist_

_Making new friends,_

_Like a Devil's Temptation,_

_But I have finally decided,_

_No longer will I repair the gone bonds,_

_No longer will I create new friends,_

_No longer, will I continue hurting the innocent,_

_No longer, will I see another cry_

**I couldn't resist but add this little chapter! This is somewhat important, but this is more of a, what happened before Day 9, which is the next chapter, and will go back to the sad tune, because, that's the type of story this is… hopefully it will be up soon, and I am working hard to keep this story "active". Sorry, I don't know how someone with ADHD would say, but Deidara just hits me as a person who would have it, as would Naruto. Possible Pairings you can vote for, the rest are already chosen of I forgot to add them (please add it to your review):**

**ShikaTema, ShikaIno**

**SasuIno, SasuKarin**

**SasoSaku, PeinSaku, GaaSaku are the easiest, DeiSaku is exceptional**

**Any other suggestions? Review please!**


	11. Day 9, Part 2: Someone Who

**Explanation for Akatsuki being the second character: Gaara is one person while the Akatsuki is a whole dang group. So… go on reading! Enjoy!**

_**Day 9, part 2: Someone Who**_

Driving to work, I listened to the radio. I heard my song in three different stations, though all different songs, it was annoying. My voice was terrible. No it was amazing, but it belonged to such a terrible soul. A terrible, screechy, soul that only wants help.

I held back the tears that seemed to run more often these days. I finally ended up in the studio, as I walked to Kakuzu.

"Why didn't you come last time?" he asked me before I could even throw in a hello. "I was worried, you didn't even call me till late the next night."

"It's nothing, I just ended up meeting someone and I needed to cool down. I didn't realize how late it was." It was nice to know someone cared. I just hoped he didn't care so much that he would cry for me when I pass away.

He sighed, as he took notice of my wig and contacts. He walked over to the elevator, and I followed him. I got used to his silent language a while ago, but I wish he used his voice more. It was comforting, hearing a voice that would say _Good job! _Instead of insults.

He turned to me suddenly, right before the elevator opened.

"I would like for you to meet your new co-worker." He stated monotone, his business side showing. I almost sighed at his change of character but held it in. "This is Gaara Sabuku, he moved all the way from Sunagakure to work with you."

I almost gasped. Note the almost. I knew that if I had, then I would be exposed. The elevator door was open, and there stood that redhead that sat next to me.

"Nice to meet you, Known Anonymous." I smiled at him.

We got to work right away, but I was self-conscience. He sang nicely, but I could tell he was suspicious. Kakuzu sighed. He seemed to know that something was up so he called for a break.

I sighed and took the elevator. Suddenly, Gaara had entered as well. I wanted to scream. Scream for help. But he might still not know who I am.

"Hey, broken eyes," he looked at me with those mysterious teal eyes. I was speechless. I couldn't talk. All that came out of my throat was a whimper. "Don't worry, I won't tell your secret."

I sighed in relief, before my back suddenly hit the wall. My eyes widened, as I was pushed against the elevator wall with his arm cornering me.

"You still haven't answered me, though. Why are your eyes broken?" I didn't speak. He growled. "Your posture tells me you're scared, your body language says you're going to give in any minute and you still resist? Why? I hate not knowing something. Something has hurt you in the past."

Suddenly anger flashed through me. "Why do you want to know my past!"

"Constricted eyes mean that you're angry," he murmured, not feeling threatened at all.

"Shut up and listen to me!"

He smirked at me. In fact, he was acting smugger by the minute. My blood started to boil. "You're not so tense anymore."

I realized that he was right. Replaced by my tension was my anger. "And you stood up for yourself." And I was left speechless once again.

He patted my head once, as once again, speechless, I was.

He suddenly let me go from his caging arms, and for a second, I didn't know why. Then the elevator door beeped and someone entered.

"_You've got to tell me sometime," _he whispered so softly, I barely heard him, "_Your hurt and you need someone to tell."_

And I knew he was right. I did not know how I knew, but I knew, that someday, I would tell someone. I need to tell someone. But at that moment, all I could hope was that it wouldn't be him.

_Day 9 (part 2): _

_Someone who could see me so easily,_

_Someone who replaces my tension,_

_With anger, so dear easily,_

_Someone who hurts me, yet heals,_

_Never, have I felt such emotions,_

_In the longest of a while_

**Guess what? It's summer break! And… my laptop thingy fixy thing came today! That means I can go back to updating regularly! What a coincidence that the last day of school would be the day my laptop gets fixed xD... Oh BTW there will be a continuation for part 1! The reason why Deidara was in her backyard shall be revealed! XD Review? For Saku-chan?**


	12. Day 9, Part 3: My Meaning

**_The Awkward Moment when someone Favorites your Story and Reviews, but forgets to put it on their Story Alerts xD_  
><strong>

**To all you writers out there, has this ever happened to you? Cause this happened to me quite often. And it seems like Facebook seems to have just gotten over "The Awkward Moment when..." so I got bored and tried it out here xD. I realized I used "xD" too much...**

**So… I'm back with a filler chapter. And um… well, I just felt like Sakura needed something to live one with… Like her own meaning, and how everyone is- well, you'll figure it out! So… enjoy! Oh and I wanted to say that my story had reached 12,121 words just the last chapter! I was overly excited, because all these chapters are so short, and I wanted to share my happiness!**

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><p><em><strong>Day 9 Part 3: My Meaning<strong>_

I sighed as I got out of my car and saw the light on in the living room. I had to climb into my room again. I looked around to see if that blonde boy was still here, and relief rushed through me as I realized he wasn't. But when I scanned the backyard once again, I noticed something was there. It was from the art class, I guessed, since I have been ditching the class, and it seems like something they would do.

I scanned it quickly, seeming like a small clay bird, something memorizing and completely indented in my mind, as I slowly reach for it. The moment I touched it however, it exploded in a soft pop. It was like a glowing second of art before it disappeared in thin air. It wasn't the loud type of explosion, but a soft one, the softer side of energy.

But I hadn't realized that it was made by the blonde till I entered my room a little later. I realized that my window was open and at first, I thought I just forgot to close it. But maybe it held another meaning.

**Idiot, it's your fault if someone stole something.**

I ignored her, just like I almost always do, as I looked at the envelope on my desk. It was a red color, and was neatly written in formal hand writing.

_**Dear to whom it may concern:**_

_**The idiot blond has forgot that it was his turn to tell people that we're putting art models in there house as a gift to prove which art is true. He believes that Art is Fleeting, while I believe that Art is Eternal. We do this monthly to different neighborhoods (this time it was your neighborhood, if you didn't figure that out, you're an idiot as well), so please pay no mind. Sorry for the trouble, as you might have to look for art in your front or backyard.**_

_**-Sasori Akasuna**_

When I read the last name, I almost gasped and giggled at the same time. It was hysterical how people keep returning to my life. I shouldn't be surprised, since karma hasn't been kind lately, but yet I was, and it wasn't funny, it was irony in a way.

I would've put the letter down, but when I moved the card down slightly, something caught my eye. I lifted the card up and down like a madwoman, but I had my reason.

When it was positioned nicely, I could clearly see the shining string, and when I grabbed it and pulled it up, out came a marionette. The eyes were entrancing, the hair was realistic, the wood was smooth, and it felt as if it was a real person. A person who would live on forever. That was a puppet, according to Sasori, and that was art.

I started moving it around, and realized that the movement was fluid and realistic, that of a real person.

But somehow, the thing about art, the reasoning of _eternal _and _fleeting_ didn't seem to make sense. The puppet was eternal, or seemed to be, while the clay figure was fleeting, and they were both quite amazing. They were both art. So what was the meaning of art?

Art was, to me, something that could be challenged, something that can change overtime, but stays in one's memory, and feels that the presence and the beauty will still be there even after many years. Something that would reflect on who the artist is.

Sasori Akasuna wants to have something secure. His parents died, and he wants something that could last forever. Something that won't disappear from him and he won't lose his grip on.

Deidara Iwa is someone who you can't forget, his presence will be there at one point, and the next, he's gone, stained into your memory.

Art is, in itself, beauty that can be reflected and challenged or agreed by others.

Life is, in itself, beauty that can be mirrored and fought for or against.

Life is, in itself, Art.

And mine is no exception. We humans are art, and my meaning of life and art is my meaning. It's my meaning and my resolve, not at all theirs, but mine alone.

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><p><em>Day 9 part 3:<em>

_My Meaning of Art is Beauty_

_My Meaning of Art is something Reflected_

_My Meaning of Art is something that can be Challenged_

_My Meaning of Art is something that can be Agreed to,_

_My Meaning of Life is Art_

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><p><strong>Okay, I figured I owe you guys an explanation. Well here's how this story is dividing up, really:<strong>

**First couple weeks: Introducing things (mainly people, however some are like thoughts and memories)**

**The third and fourth week: Showing how she will get attached.**

**The fifth and sixth is mostly about introducing some more drama**

**The seventh and eighth is making amends to the old friends**

**The ninth is solving her emotions (and even more drama -.-)**

**The tenth and eleventh are how she reacts to them (solving some drama)**

**The twelfth is basically how she's changed, showing them by how she acts (how she acts during the drama)**

**Thirteenth is preparing for the final concert**

**Fourteenth is her dying days**

**And finally her death D: **

**Just so you know…. This will be very slow-paced if you hadn't figured that out xD **

**I promise it will go back to the sad-ish tune soon, lately, though, I've been writing happy-go-lucky stuff (stuff I would never update in FanFic xD) And I always warn u guys about a poll, and this is no different! Vote on what type a story I should write (bleach, fairy tail, inuyasha and shugo chara) I hate when authors do this... but I need to have at least 45 reviews (total, of course... that means six more) by the next time I update. I want to see who is still reading, since I feel like I lost you guys at chapter 9 and 10... and plus, I need motivation for the fact that I will be having HOMEWORK in SUMMER :O stupid classes... so review? for the next chapter? Luv u, writing/reading buddies!**


	13. Day 10: My Happiness

**Hey guess what? It's been ten days (in the story)! Thank you to all my subscribers and favorite-ers. But I would like to thank my reviewers the most! (* is helping me grow as a writer and making me feel like one as well)**

***Rose202* (first reviewer/subscriber)**

***Music1462* (read a lot of my old stories [deleted quite a few] and actually knew I improved and also was my first favorite-er) **

**Yuki-Hime 2097**

**G-Dragon's –Queen (who used to be called Kawaii Cupcakes when she first reviewd)**

**Anonymous reviewer: Kiria4L**

***Black snake eyes* (reviewed six times! Made me feel glad that someone takes the time to let me now that they are still reading!)**

***MystereKitsune* (the first one to review when I was feeling down… made my day, really!)**

**YhenCay **

**NorthenLights1239**

***Art of Harmony* (used to be CherryFairy93: truly made me feel like a writer… U hadn't subscribed so I am not sure if you are reading this, but I am thankful for that review!)**

**Essy-Chan**

***Kireicomplex* (the longest review, even if half of it was voting… I laughed hard when u returned the YOU have to power thing, and it made me feel… responsibility [as a writer])**

**DontWaitUpForMe **

**La canelle**

**XxStarLitxX (thanks so much for the birthday wish! Tell ur friend happy birthday, and glad that a reader wished me something :D but really, thank you for appreciating… my will? xD I am pretty sure I messaged u, I have to look through my inbox later)**

**AkatsukisLonelyBlossem101**

**KungPowKira (BTW I will try to add ItachiXSakura moments, but we'll see if she ends up with him… people have to vote first!)**

**Grigffindork93**

**Theblanckunend**

**Sakuraflowerstar**

**Insert name here please **

**I would especially like to thank the ones that reviewed most recently! They are the ones that show that they are still reading, so thank you! Keep up the reviews! I have reached somewhere around 45, I hope, and I really do read all of them… I would also like to say that I have never thanked you enough, and I was honestly quite surprised with the number of people who reviewed… not to many people on this website seemed to like dark stuff, but it seems like I was wrong :D. I will thank you all again on "Day 20" :D **

_**Day 10: My Happiness; Their Happiness**_

I held in a sigh, as I tried walking outside the classroom.

"Look, poor _Saku-chan_ is in a hurry," taunted Karin. I clenched my fists, as I just kept my head down. I could feel the red heads gaze, as I just walk out the door, my black hoodie covering part of my eyes as I leant over the ground.

**Well excuse me, but I don't want to be late to my next class, don't blame me if you get detention.**

I tried to get away quick. From all the taunts, from all the pain, but it haunts me all the way outside of the room, their laughter echoed in the halls. I kept my head down, as the students outside of the enclosed, suffocating room started to make fun of me again.

"She still has the pink hair, huh? Maybe she didn't dye it… she probably got bubble gum stuck in her hair and can't get it out!"

**Why do you have red hair, huh? Maybe you tripped onto some berry pie! Talk about gross!**

I just kept walking, fast walking, but when I bumped into someone, me being so petite and under-weight from not eating enough, fell on my butt, on the cold concrete floor. I heard a few whimpers to the side, as I watched everyone clear the way, rushing towards their classes. I felt my hood drop, as I started to feel the warmth around me get cold. The hood was my shield from the words, and it covers all my tears. Without it, I felt defenseless.

"Hey watch where you are going, brat."

I shielded my face, waiting for a punch or something painful to hit me. It never came, as I was thinking that if I get a black eye, my dad would beat me for being weak. I looked up to see a guy with blue skin and blue hair. He had gills like a shark, and teeth sharp like a piranha. I slightly wondered if it was his genes, but I shoved that thought away as I realized it shouldn't matter to me, for I had pink hair.

I cowered away, removing my hand from my face as I slowly backed away, trying to scoot on my bottom, like a little kid. Suddenly he knelt down in front of me, still towering over me, studying my face.

_Don't look at my face… Don't bully me!_

"Hey, you're eyes…"

I waited for an insult, waited, as he just stared into them.

"They are really pretty…"

My eyes widened a bit, as I just tried to get away from him. Suddenly he reached for me, as I flinched away. _He was going to hurt me. He is going to yank my hair, and beat me!_ I thought, so used to being abused that it was the only expectation I had when someone reached for me.

Suddenly, he reached for my hair, softly twirling it around.

"You didn't dye it, huh? Pinky, your hair is natural. If you dyed it, you're hair wouldn't be so silky and nice. The hair fits you."

I was speechless, as I just tried to shake off the compliments. I started tearing up, not hearing a single nice thing about me at school since last time I had friends.

_I'm dreaming. He's lying. I'm hallucinating. He's tricking me. I fell and got knocked out. He's joking with me._

I tried to think if it was real and he was trying to trick me, or it was my fault that I was deperate for a compliment.

**Sakura, outer dear, you know he's not lying. Look at his eyes.**

I knew Inner was right; his eyes showed that he was hiding nothing, his eyes were speaking for him, and he looked like he wanted to say more, but he held back.

He suddenly stood up, and offered his hand to me. I grabbed onto it, realizing that his hands were rough, yet it was skin. I wondered what I thought it was supposed to be. Scales? He lifted me off the floor, as he squeezed my hand to make sure I don't slip from his large ones.

"You're so light! Do you even eat?" he joked.

"You're hair…" I whispered, but he suddenly whipped his head towards me, making me waver from my unconfident nature. "It's… cool, too," I offered. He suddenly gave a bright grin to me, his sharp teeth brightly glowing at me. It reminded me of something innocent who didn't mean anything but happiness.

"Thanks!" he said happily, "that was the first time I heard you talk, Pinky!"

I offered him a small smile, before saying to him, "You're going to be late… Fish sticks."

"How original," he rolled his eyes, "C'mon, I'll walk you to your class, bubblegum," he started to walk, as I ran to catch up.

"Sure, sure… Jaws," I playfully said, still a bit quiet, still unsure if I should joke around. He rolled his eyes, as I lead him to my room.

"Bye, Pink Buddy."

"Bye… Blue… buddy?" I questioned. He just laughed it off as I processed what happened.

He called me his buddy. Probably jokingly, but he called me his buddy.

Suddenly, it felt odd. I got a warm feeling in my stomach, but a cold feeling in my heart. Happiness and Butterflies; Guilt and Sorrow. I wished I never bumped into him, but glad I did. I was being selfish, but it would be okay if I avoided him, right?

I hope I could pull it off, with the final 90 days haunting me. It was going to be a long time till I finally die. I just hope that even if I was lonely, I would stay that way. It's not right for me to be selfish.

Because what would affect me in 90 days would affect others for the rest of their high school days… or possibly the rest of their lives.

_Day 10:_

_I couldn't get close_

_Even if they wanted me to_

_I couldn't let them suffer_

_For the price is small_

_All that was needed_

_Was my happiness_

_To be sure their happiness_

_Wouldn't be sold_

**Hey, once again, thanks for the reviews! I might have not reached my 45 reviews goal, but I got 43, and that's more than I could ask for, really. Did you know I have more favorites than subscribers? xD thought it would be the other way around. I always found Kisame the type to make friends anywhere. I mean, his smile is huge (sharp, but huge) And… now that we got the voting thing checked off, and polling and what not, I wanted to inform you that now, for the next 10 "days" I want to get to know all my readers better! And now for the (temporary) results! **

**First, the Sakura Pairings!**

**PeinSaku:2 :D**

**SasoSaku: 0 (I see that none of my Don't Tell a Soul readers are not reviewing xD either that or they don't read this or they prefer another couple… though that makes me curious…and I will be updating that soon as well, but for now, I am focusing mainly on this)**

**GaaSaku: 2 :D**

**DeiSaku: 1**

**ItaSaku: 1**

**Akatsuki in general… waiting for them to appear I guess?: 3**

**Next are who she makes up with:**

**Shikamaru: 2**

**Neji: 2**

**Hinata: 2**

**Naruto: 1**

**Ino: 1 (I actually like her! Ino-chan is a good girl! … oh god Tobi is influencing me)**

**And… Kiba: 1**

**(I added my votes on this… hope you don't mind!)**

**And how it ends!**

**Die:3**

**Live: 2**

**Suicide: none… yay!**

**Alternate endings… (like a two chapter thing that show how it ends differently): 1 (I found this idea smart! why didn't I think of it!)**

**Add anything you like, but to make things easier, I will have 3 quick "polls" for each chapter. Answer whichever you like, each chapter will be different… it will go from least personal to most personal from the 1-3 thing… at least in my opinion (I will give my answer in the next chapter!):**

**Quick! You have to either save Pein, Sasori, Gaara, Itachi, or Deidara when they are falling off a cliff! Problem… you can only save one! Which one do you save? **

**I assume that most of you are girls, but are any of you guys? (girls do not answer… do not worry, guys will be limited on the next chapter xD)**

**What type of household do you live in? Two-story, one-story, mansion, abusive (though I am not sure if you would actually put that), comforting, two parents, 1 parent, a guardian, poor, rich, anything that would describe it… (must put 3 adjectives or something…) [no I am not planning to stalk any of you. Don't worry]**

**When the next 10 days pass, I will reverse it to voting!**

**Thanks for voting, and tune in again… hopefully next week! If I don't have to much homework... And now I am off to eat breakfast right before school... I am going to die XP Revive me with Reviews xD!**


	14. Day 11 Part 1: Do You?

**Hey! Day 11 here! so… just so you guys know, I am doing it by days, and that means this day is Thursday… needed to point it out, just so when you are reading it, you don't get confused by the day of the week! (that always happens to me when reading a novel! Like… wait, it isn't winter! Oh wait, I am reading a novel…) Anyways, wanted to say that I AM an astrology nerd, though not very good at it. It's an on and off thing, like, once a year for 3 months I get into it.! Enjoy reading!**

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><p><em><strong>Day 11 part 1: Do you?<strong>_

I waited outside of the library door; hand on knob, not sure if I was waiting for someone or something to happen. I pushed the door open anyways, pushing away the feeling of awkwardness. The chatter inside the library stopped, mainly from a single table, the only one with people in it. It was obvious that they were talking about me the way they stopped, but I walked over anyways. Eyes glazed on me, wishing me away, wishing that they can once again speak. They wish for me to part and leave them their voice.

"Hey, Aries sun, Cancer moon, Libra ascendant," greeted the president, breaking the unbearable, the cruel, the unforgiving, silence. I waved at the Astrology clubs president as I took my regular seat.

"Hello, President Aries sun, Scorpio moon, Cancer ascendant," I addressed her. She nodded approvingly, as we started working. But not before Hinata looked at me once more. I had just brought her into the club a bit before the "betrayal" or whatever I would call it, but it hurt to see her just look at me with a blank face.

I smiled at her anyways. "Capricorn sun."

"A-Aries sun," she greeted me back, with a blank face. For a second, I saw hurt in her eyes, from not being able to do what, I don't know. But it was gone the second I saw it.

We were all a part of the newspaper club, but I started to say that we should have an astrology column. The president of the newspaper club refused, but many others had liked the idea, so we started to make our own newspaper about horoscopes. We practice on each other by calling the higher ups with the full sun, moon and ascendant, and our equal by their sun. Anyone that is a freshman is with their sun and moon. The only one that calls everyone with all three is the president. The re-elected one.

"Aries sun," I turned to the Capricorn Hinata, as she just blushed from the attention. "Y-you're c-c-calculating it wrong!" she exclaimed, fixing it. I smiled at her softly without her noticing. Without anyone noticing. If anyone had, I would have quit the club right away. Hinata doesn't need to know that I still care; after all, she was the innocent one. I don't want her to hurt anymore.

"Just like old times," she said under her breath. I chose to ignore it, as tears started to brim in my eyes. She shouldn't have mentioned that. I remembered when she first showed me how to calculate astrology.

_Do you ever regret showing me this?_

I glanced as her graceful fingers started to calculate Asuma sensei's

_Do you ever regret showing me what you were most passionate about? What made you become my friend and made you hurt? _ I thought to myself, no one noticing that a single tear rolled down my cheek.

"_I regret it… because it hurt you." _I mouthed to myself.

"D-d-d-did you s-s-s-say somet-t-t-thing, Aries s-sun?" Hinata said, not even offering me a worried look.

"Nothing, Capricorn sun," I smiled at her, making sure that I she couldn't see through my façade. She nodded as she turned back to her paper. "Just a question," I said innocently, as she glanced at me curiously. I stroked the astrology calculation softly, as if stroking a cheek, as it lied on the desk.

"Do you ever regret doing what you do or did?" She looked surprised for a second, as I continued. "Because I do, and I was wondering if we have similar feelings," I could tell that she could the unsaid _"still"_ in my sentence. She didn't blink once, before returning to her work. But without blinking, it showed her unshed tears.

Proving that I did have an effect in people's lives. It would be easier if people didn't regret. Didn't think about me. Grief would overshadow their regret, while if they didn't have regret, they would start. Just regret is better than regret and grief. Regret can be overshadowed easily, and it would be better if they put a cover on it with happiness rather than sadness. You can't cover sadness with happiness, you can only hide the regret. It is easily ignored.

That's why I wish she didn't feel the regret. Why she never should have feel the pain of not being with me. Because pain is better than emotional sadness. I experienced that first hand. The pain from my father's abusive ways and the depression of not being with anyone, it is easy to see that my father is crushing me. However, I am crushing my spirit. I should never let Hinata regret and crush herself.

She, herself, should not regret.

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><p><em>Day 11:<em>

_Do you ever regret?_

_**(Seeing me?)**_

_Do you ever regret?_

_**(Befriending me?)**_

_Do you ever regret?_

_**(Betraying me)**_

_Do you ever regret?_

_I hope you don't_

_Because if so_

_**(If you do regret)**_

_You will cry soon,_

_**(Smile more, dear friend)**_

_For I will hurt you_

_**(I don't want to)**_

_Without even trying_

_**(I would do anything to save you)**_

_Do you ever regret?_

_**(I hope you don't)**_

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><p><strong>Got this idea from <strong>_**"**__**I think Hinata should grovel for forgiveness! Friends definitely shouldnt betray other friends that way."**_** –Yuki –Hime 2097 and I was thinking about how to show her uncertainty. If this did show it… And this is a filler because it's not introducing anything. I am trying to use my days wisely.**

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><p>"<em><strong>God this is a good story. Its funny too though ... I know it probly<strong>__**  
><strong>__**wasn't ur intent but I mean the irony. This is my life right now, except I**__**  
><strong>__**have until august. I won't b able to even go to high school. Thank u for**__**  
><strong>__**writing this story it means a lot to me. :-)"**_** I read this review in a hurry. Quickly, that all I caught was the first three sentences and the last. Then I came back and read it and almost cried. She said it meant a lot to her (I am guessing she's a girl. No way I am reffering "her" as an 'it') and I was happy about that, but reading this made me want to write even more. I promise that I will get through at least make Sakura happier before August. That's why I updated so fast. It might sound a bit rush but I wanted to give you all a heads up. I didn't have the time to edit it to make it more flow-y, but I will make Sakura happy by August, even if she might not still read it (anonymous reviewer, so I have no idea if she's still reading it) I might be updating twice a day three times a day or once a week, but I promise I will. After this, though, I will be making it sound better than this chapter. I wanted to update this as soon as I can.**

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><p><strong>well, I hope you don't mind, but it was a bit short, but I hope I was able to capture some good moments in this chapter. So as you can see, Ino taught her meaning of flowers, Hinata taught her astrology, Gaara knows body language, what else do you think characters will know? I will tell you that I know most of the things that Sakura knows (I actually know the meaning of flowers, astrology and body langue, but probably only the basics)<strong>

**Quick Poll Author Answers:**

**1: If I had to save one, I will tell you this explanation first.**

**Pein wants world peace**

**Itachi wants his brother to be at peace**

**Sasori got his parents killed, though he waited for years. Shows how much he cares.**

**Deidara would have a flying clay bird**

**I would chose Pein since he would affect the world the most.**

**3:Household is: Messy, two-story, and home-y (extra information. I completely adore my dad and he's like a big buddy rather than a dad. Definitely not like Sakura's dad. My mom is awesome. But sometimes I wish she will leave me alone. I get that I watch too much anime, no need to tell me to stop, I mean I wouldn't stop, but your nagging makes it worst… makes me want to get comfort from my anime again. Then there is my brother. Not much about him, besides that he's always half naked and we're always rough housing. It's fun though! That's it about my family/house)**

**Quick Poll questions:**

**1: what's your favorite astrology sign (besides yours)?**

**2: what is your astrology sign, and what do you know about it?**

**3: (Girls only) What do you classify yourself as, and what would you never even think of being? (prep, goth, girly, tomboy, sporty)**

**Extra: What is the something you've learned from a friend? Can't be from you family members, it has to be a friend. Sakura learned Astrology from Hinata and meanings of Flowers from Ino. She learned the meaning of art (and life) with the help of Deidara and Sasori. Doesn't even have to be something like meanings of flowers, it could be a lesson on life or how to swim or something like that.**

**Anyone figure out what's the bold on the poem? Should be simple enough.**

**OMG I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! I come back from school after, what, four hours, and I have NINE FREAKING REVIEWS! I LOVE YOU GUYS!**

**Hope you review! Can't wait to get to know you guys!**


	15. Day 11 part 2: Something That

**Enjoy reading! I would've updated this yesterday, however, my uncle had deleted the chapter by accident. I am so sorry for not updating sooner! It's not as good as the other one I wrote, but I did my best to duplicate it! Sorry and thank you for staying with me!**

_**Day 11, Part 2: Something That**_

I opened the door slightly, listening for the slightest sound of life.

"That bitch, she's late again!" my father slurred his words. I sighed quietly as I closed the door silently. I should've figured. He was drunk once again, and if I entered now, I would get a rough beating. It was already enough that I upset Hinata, but now I have to face a drunken man.

**You don't need too. Let's go somewhere fun! Your hideout maybe!**

I sighed, tempting, but decided to stay away from the torturous playground. Something might come along.

**Or someone. **

A flicker of orange hair and silver piercing dashed in my mind before pushing it away. I shouldn't remember anything that belongs in the past. I shouldn't worry about the present. I shouldn't care for my future. No one matters right now. It's just me in my own dark little world. No one should remember me for who I am.

And that's the way it's supposed to be.

And I ran from my past and run from my future, to be alone with the present, I run from the house, I run from my friends, into the outskirts of town, to place I call my home. It seems so wild compared to the urban city.

So free.

Unlike the chained bird, Neji was talking about. Him and I, chained to something that we wish not to be chained by. The cadet branch is stuck like a collar, and death chained my ankle, not allowing me to jump up and dream.

The colorful autumn leaves seemed to swirl around me, trying to convince me that I am still full of life, color, still have something interesting about me. The birds mocked me by singing in a way I could never sing. The apple and cherry blossom in the middle of all these trees intertwined, blooming for the first time in years. Late bloom. Maybe I could bloom still, after so many years of being a shadow.

But I shook the thought out of my head.

The beautiful trees still made fun of me, filling me with false hope, as I stare into my reflection in the small pond, with a single lily pad. Already night, the Lily had already sunk down. Hiding from evil. Hiding from me.

The red tulips seemed unnatural, swaying above the pond, swaying on the outer part. The flowers representing everlasting love would wither away.

Mom and Nagato.

And a single white rose blossomed in the middle of it all; autumn seemed not to bother the flower. Innocence. It wasn't me. That was for sure. I took out my pen, breaking it open above the unsuspecting rose, ink spilling all over the innocence. Tainted, that was what I was. The flower bent over, hiding in the red tulips, the ink made it sink, the shame hiding the flower.

"Doesn't anyone see me?" a single tear rolled down my cheeks, as I whispered it.

"I do." I jerked around to see a green haired man, half black, half white.

"What are you doing here?" As I realized how stupid it sound. This place belonged to the government, the city.

"You don't own this place, do you? I take care of this place."

"Who are you?" He smiled softly. An alluring, mysterious smile, showing that he knew more than he should. More than I suspected.

"As suspected, you don't remember me." He sounded slightly hurt, as I cringed at the pain.

"Who are you?" I questioned with more urgency than before.

"I was the boy in the hospital. The boy who you convinced that there was more to life than death."

And once again, the voice that wanted to scream was back. But not of sadness or anger or fear. It was of happiness and surprise. This boy was from the past, yes, but no bad memories associated with him.

"Z-Zetsu?" He looked surprised that I knew his name.

"Well, yes, Sakura, but you've got to leave. You have to go now." He said it with such urgency, that I ran and ran, long and far from the place.

Along the way, I began to smile to myself, having such a memory without pain or anything to do with it. Nothing to do with the betrayal or death or anything. Such a memory exists, and that was enough for me.

Something like that exists just made me gleeful. And for once, I wasn't running from something like that past or future. I was running with the hope of meeting it again. I let out a joyful smile, before I pressed it back down. It was a small memory, happy, but nothing to cure me. But something like it existed.

_Day 11 part 2:_

_Something that opens me up_

_Something that tries to cure_

_But that Something that doesn't heal_

_Something like a memory_

_Something that is a memory_

_A Happy memory_

_Surely Exists Somewhere_

_Something like that exists_

_Even the slightest bit_

_Something like him_

**I love Zetsu! I wanted Sakura to have some real history with an Akatsuki member, but there were few left that made sense. And then I remembered that Sakura meant cherry blossom and Zetsu is a plant-y guy. Anyone would break down before long and I didn't know how to portray Sakura insane after that. So, I gave her something to cling on. A happy memory. I will give details on that later in the story.**

**Quick Poll Author Answers:**

**Honestly I would have liked mine anyways, but since I have to choose one, my favorite astrology sign is: Aquarius because a. they are so interesting and different and b. I like ones that seem mysterious**

**I am an Aries, and they are often confident and the newborn of the astrological members. I would get more into detail, but I cant have my author's note longer than my story, now can I?**

**I am a girly tomboy (a tomboy that dresses like a girly girl) and I would never consider myself a prep for the bad reputation they have. If they perhaps seemed to be less "bitchy" than maybe... Not calling all preps that, but when someone classifies you as one, people will either take offense or think it a compliment.**

**I learned from my friends that I need to be myself and not be in their shadows. I also learned that it's okay to be interested in the same stuff as them (always got scared of getting called a copycat) and it's okay to be different.**

**Quick poll questions:**

**Is there anything that you guys wish you could change? If you do, would it be something as drastic as what Sakura wants to change?**

**When you meet someone outside school your house or work, how would you react to them? The people you don't like, you hate, you like, you love, how do you react?**

**What's your happiest memory? Something that has nothing to do with pain. Who are the people in your memory? **

**I now have SIXTY FREAKING REVIEWS! THANK YOU ALL! LOVE YOU GUYS! And I think they might be calling reviews comments, but I will call them reviews for now. It sounds so much better and kinder.**

**Hope you enjoyed this brief chapter! Tune in again!**


	16. Day 12: Light Up

**I am so sorry! It turns out that I made a mistake in my writing! It's actually Lotus, not Lily! I was talking to my aunt (her name is lily) and I totally forgot which flower was which! D: But the good news is I am back with another chapter! Why wouldn't I be back if I made a new chapter! I hope you guys are reading this, because I HATE getting my readers confused. Even the slightest bit…I did write this in a rush since I was grounded and just got permission to write my story and publish it on here, but Enjoy reading! **

_**Day 12: Light Up**_

I walked through the halls as people tried to trip me. I avoided them carefully, my reflexes fast, but not just from my dancing skills. I push away the thoughts as I smiled about yesterday. Smiled through my eyes. Slightly, smiled in a way that no one could see. Smiled through the windows of my soul.

I was early, a time where very few students came, but all the student that did come early _would _try to trip me. Everyone wanted to see me fall. I immediately avoided the one place my friends would gather.

**Your old friends.**

They would forever be my friends, not in a way I could trust them, but still, forever my friends. When someone stops being your friends, you don't just stop being theirs.

**Then why are you avoiding them.**

Because they don't want to see me.

**Or do you not want to see them?**

I stayed quiet, wondering which was right.

**I am your most inner thoughts. If I thought it, then you thought it as well.**

And I knew she was right, and I knew, but denied it all. Because denying was something that I could do. Something that I could be.

Suddenly, on my way to the classroom, room G8, the past band room, made a noise. Someone was inside. My curiosity, though diminished, got the best of me, putting my ear near the door.

"Itachi…" a familiar voice said as I almost gasped, "Itachi, why does no one know you have killed mother and father?"

"Who said I killed them, foolish little brother. They wouldn't believe that I would. They wouldn't believe a 7 year old over a 9, don't you think?" Itachi, the familiar name, said, "And how do you even know if I killed them?"

"I _saw_ you there, Itachi! I saw that you were home, and in mother and father's room! Who else could it have been?" Sasuke said, not even asking. He demanded it.

Suddenly I heard shuffling. I stood up, immediately straight and took a few steps back for the door to open.

A boy with long hair and stress marks on his face. He turned to me as I gasped. His eyes, they were so familiar, so much like Sasuke's, but with so much pain, so much sadness hidden in it. I wondered if this is what Gaara saw in me, but his eyes, they blinked twice, before they were stoic, not betraying any emotion.

But I know what I saw.

Lonliness. Sadness. Anger. Every negative emotion that could crush a person. But he's still standing, right before me, reminding me of Sasuke, reminding me of the Uchiha's, reminding me of the past as he turned away.

"You should get to class."

We both turned to the unforgotten Uchiha, staring at me. His eyes were harsh and cruel, but there was something behind his eyes. I turned back to the older brother, staring at him for a while. His eyes went soft, but he was obviously upset.

I wondered if this was what people saw when you read their eyes.

"Haruno."

"Sasuke."

He narrowed his eyes at me, but the same eyes tried to say something else. He tried to make something of me, but he seemed to have given up.

"What are you doing here? Get out of my sight."

I looked once more at Itachi, his eyes once again stoic, staring right back at me.

And by then, I knew that I wanted to be the one who makes their eyes read nothing but joy.

Because when someone who stops being your friend, you don't stop being theirs.

Because when you see someone who needs help, you don't leave them crying on their own.

Because this was the least I could do for the two brothers.

The least I could do for _my _Uchiha's.

Because _just once_ I wanted to see them smile.

_Day 12:_

_This was the least I could do,_

_Patch up the soul that was once,_

_Maybe then,_

_I could see their eyes,_

_Just once,_

_Light Up_

**Well, I got grounded from staying out too late. I didn't know the movie was going to start late! But I got permission to write my stories and publish them here for now. Sorry, I **_**was**_** going to update yesterday, but I couldn't use the computer at all yesterday. I got permission today.**

**More on her past with the Uchiha's later too! Can't wait to get to those parts, reliving the past! **

**Quick Poll Author Answers:**

**I have nothing I really want to change, but if it I have to change something (and no, no way it's as drastic as Sakura's) I would change the fact that this is just a fanfiction story and publish this. I would love to have people who have **_**never**_** heard of fanfiction to read this story, even if it's not good enough to be published. I love sharing my stories, and I want the whole world to read it, not just fanfictin readers.**

**People I don't like: Act like I don't know them unless they come over to me. Hate: Act like I don't know them even if they come over to me. Love: Be a ninja and stalk them. Like: "HEY! COME HERE! OMG I HAVE NEVER SEEN MY FRIEND HERE BEFORE! OMIGAWD I AM SO HAPPY I AM GOING TO POST THIS ON MY NEXT CHAPTER ON FANFICTION!"**

**My happiest memory is swimming 3 times a day with my cousin on summer, every day, playing pokemon (we would be trainers and catch them) with each other, and just hanging out like any normal little girls would during summer.**

**Quick Poll:**

**If you had to kill one of the Akatsuki members with your own hands, who would it be?**

**Is there anyone you would like to see smile because of you?**

**Who is someone who can make you smile any day at any time?**

**I reached 72 reviews! Do you guys know how amazing you guys are? Next time my goal is 80! Though I would update tomorrow or the next day even without it! Hope to have you guys reading again!**

**Thanks for reading! Tune in again!**


	17. Day 12 Part 2: To Be

**Sorry for the late update! But I am back! Well, actually it's been 2 days, but it is summer, and that's so little! I have to update every day! Or else, I won't make Sakura happy by August! And I am so happy my favorite Naruto female character is in here! (Can you believe it? Sakura is **_**not**_** my favorite character? All my stories are starring Sakura too!) Enjoy reading! **

_**Day 12 part 2: To Be; Or, Perhaps, Not to Be**_

"Hey! Wait up!" a familiar voice said, trying to catch up to me, as I continued to walk briskly. "Pinky! What's the rush?" Kisame grabbed my shoulder as he panted to catch his breath, "I swear, you walk faster than I run!" he gave me a goofy grin.

I gave him a blank face as I continued walking. I didn't want to hurt him, but I couldn't be his friend. Not now, not ever. "Hey, fish sticks. I am heading to art."

He frowned at me as he said, "What's the matter, Pinky?"

"Nothing."

He just shrugged as he walked me to art and waved me good-bye. I sighed, putting my head down in despair. It's getting harder to avoid people and getting harder to resist temptations of making friends. It's also, thanks to Kisame walking me to half my classes, getting harder to ditch.

The art class stared at me as they saw me enter.

"It's nice to see you again, _Sakura,_" they stressed out my name and sneered at me. "So much for your passionate feelings of art," the same student said bitterly to me. I didn't say a word, didn't give them the satisfaction they didn't deserve.

I took notice of the blonde in the back, Deidara, talking, or should I say, arguing with the redhead, Sasori. The blonde one took notice of me and waved and grinned. Trying to push down any feelings that came up, Sasori also looked at me, coldly, but recognition swerved through his eyes, as he turned towards the window. I could see embarrassment tinting his cheeks.

**Someone's got a crush!**

_No… It's because I saw him when he was most vulnerable._

I turned around as another student took a seat next to me.

"Sakura," a feminine, familiar, voice said, as if announcing it to a crowd. I turned to the blue haired girl, with grey, sad eyes. Her grey eyes flickered between grey and a grey-ish amber, her old, un-tinted color. She looked at me worriedly, as I remembered she hasn't been in this school since before the betrayal happened. Before I became so emotionless.

"Konan," I gave her a small smile, but made sure my face went back to its stoic look. I wouldn't hurt her, definitely not someone who I could consider my sister.

"Sakura, why are you never with Ino or Hinata?" she got straight to the point. I wanted to smile at her, but I couldn't. I already once, but twice would be friendly. Twice would be two too many.

"When you cut the ties, it's hard to tie it back together," I said, "Especially when you were not the one to cut it."

Konan gave me a sad smile and knowing eyes. "You don't have to ruin yourself for it. How about you come to my house later?" I shook my head. It's better to not get closer than how we already were. "You should really come. I haven't seen you in ages… And it's nice to see someone after being gone for a year."

Why must others tempt me? Why do they even try to be my friend?

**Why must you question them? Why can't you be the slightest bit selfish?**

Because no one does something for no reason. Because soon I won't have the need to be selfish. I will be a corpse with nothing to even mind about. Death is the end to all my hardships and pains.

**And the end of your happy and positive feelings. They should outweigh the fact that it's the end to hardships. They should make you fight for your life. It's best for you to treasure your happiness now, before it's too late. You need to be happy before you die, and at this rate, you won't even remember the pleasure of having a friend.**

"Sakura?" Konan called out to me, breaking me away from my thoughts. "Sakura, are you okay?"

"Of course I am," I smiled at her, hoping that the bell would ring soon. Hoping that class, oh dreadful class, would start.

"Okay, just remember, I am always here for you. I will always be your friend when you are in need."

**But maybe, at this rate, you won't even need to remember. They will remind you of the feeling instead.**

But I don't need to be happy.

**But you want to be happy, and that's what matters now. That's what others want, and what you want. You said it yourself: "I shouldn't remember anything that belongs in the past. I shouldn't worry about the present. I shouldn't care for my future." Don't worry; just do what you truly want to do. If they realize what you realize, they shouldn't remember you later because you will belong in the past.**

Inner was a devil's temptation. She knew what to say to convince me that it was okay to exist. She knew what to say what to get me to do what I truly want to do. But were these my true wishes? Or were they a devil's whisper, asking me to grab the off-limit fruit? Or maybe, it's a test of a god, testing me, taunting me, intoxicating me with wishes that I could never wish for.

**Because you want to be happy, they want you happy, and I want us happy.**

Because maybe I was pathetic, because I was weak willed, I wanted myself to be selfishly happy. I was yearning for something that was in reach, yet I knew if I grabbed it, it would punish the ones I would care for. Because happiness was in reach, it's harder for me to resist.

Because I was so desperate to save myself, I might be able to bring myself up to their level, before I bring us all down.

**Because it's your wish…**

…to be happy

_Day 12 part 2:_

_To be Happy,_

_Because of a Petty Wish,_

_To bring Other Down,_

_To save Myself,_

_To be so Weak,_

_And be Selfishly Happy,_

_Was I willing To Be?_

_Or was I Not To Be?_

_For, _that_, is the question_

**Ugh, this didn't turn out as good as I wanted! Oh well, I hope you enjoyed it!**

**Quick Poll Author Answers**

**1. Madara. He's evil. Plain evil… Tobi too… Oh my second is Hidan, he's annoying to me. Cute, but seriously…Annoying**

**2. Who wouldn't want to make their crush smile! Actually, I got over him but I still want him to smile because I haven't seen him smile in the longest time without his best friend. Which to me, it's kind've upsetting cause he was really smiley back then and was truly the brightest person back then.**

**3. I am a smiley person as well, so anyone can make me smile! Especially your guys reviews, but if you want a specific person, my cousin. **

**Quick Poll:**

**1. Any talents? I love to hear about them!**

**2. If you had to choose between bringing alive Konan, Hinata, or Temari, who would you bring alive?**

**3. If you knew you were going to die, would you have the courage to tell your friends? Honestly? Or would you hide it like Sakura and pretend everything is okay? If you hide it, would you cut loose your ties with everyone, or go on living like its okay?**

**Thanks again for reading! I would appreciate your reviews! Trying to make my average above 5 reviews per chapter! If I get 100 reviews before chapter 20 (this is the 17****th**** I believe) than the 100****th**** reviewer can have a one-shot relating to this story! Only valid if it's before chapter 20! Though, I am not really good at one-shots, I will be sure to make sure it's good enough!**


	18. Day 12 Part 3: Because What

**Hey hey! Happy July 4****th**** if you guys are in America! Wanted to update as soon as possible! Enjoy reading!**

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><p><em><strong>Day 12 Part 3: Because What I Do Now...<strong>_

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><p>Konan dragged me out of school, dragging me to her car.<p>

"I said I can't come over," I mumbled as she continued to pull me. I cursed her in my mind, as Inner tried to convince me that it's not my fault. It's their fault for getting closer. For they are trying to get closer. And I am not.

"Nonsense! I haven't seen you for a year, and you have got to meet my friends. I've never introduced you guys for the seven years that we know each other!" She basically screamed out the words, piercing my ears. I realized that she was acting extra cheerful. Acting extra cheerful for me. Reluctantly, I followed her, while looking for any possible escape. It's enough that I would see her at art every day now. She's dragging me to that house.

The house that is closer to home than my own house.

It was a terrible feeling, knowing that I was going to be comfortable. It's too early to be even the slightest bit happy. Too early, knowing that I was dying. And too early, getting close to her.

Suddenly, I bumped into someone, as I realized that Konan wasn't grasping my hand anymore. I was following her. I cursed myself for my mistake.

"Hey, bitch, watch where you are going."

He had silver hair and violet pink eyes. They were strange, like me, and his eyes were narrowed to the point that I would think he was squinting.

"Sorry," I mumbled towards him, walking by him. Walking father from the contact. Any contact was bad contact.

"Sorry isn't enough, whore," he moved in front of me, blocking me from going any further.

"Hidan," Konan snarled his name, as Hidan paid no mind to her.

"Hey!" I exclaimed, as they both looked surprised, "At least respond to her when she talks to you! What gentleman you are!" I yelled at him. As if I realized what I had done, I covered my mouth.

**Good, but next time, I want you to stand up for yourself,**Inner said, trying to get me more agitated, **Not your friend, but for yourself. Be more independent.**

The man known as Hidan pushed me towards the nearest car, as he tried to hit me. I dodge it, carefully, making sure he didn't damage the car. In the corner of my eyes, I could see the crowd gathering. But there was a specific person I wanted to see there. Or two.

Hidan looked surprised to see that I dodged it, but he threw another punch anyways, as I blocked it this time. I glanced towards the crowd, still searching for the two. I saw Konan, looking grim and pale, as I hoped that she wouldn't look any worse when I die.

She was the one I didn't want to see cry at all.

Suddenly, two people push their way towards me, or they think, the fight. A girl with two buns and a boy with a bowl cut and bushy brows.

When they see me, they grimace as they see the position I am in. I was on the defensive, but I was about to change that now. Now that I know that my two superiors are watching. For them to see that I hadn't just cared about my looks and to see that I had been paying attention to their lessons.

To show them I was more than deadweight.

"Bitch, pay fucking attention to me!" he yelled a he charged for the third time. I easily catch his fist and threw him over my shoulder, as he made a loudly groaned on the floor. Konan rushed to be excitedly.

"I didn't know you could do that!" she exclaimed, as I knew she would've taken care of it much harsher. She was an amazing fighter as well, and she was much stronger both physically and mentally. I walked towards the two black belts. They realized that I saw them, and suddenly found the floor interesting.

"I do pay attention to my friends…" I whisper to both of them as I walk past. "Especially when they think it's important for me to learn what they know… and to make them not worry about me. I pay attention to you guys more than you guys would ever know, and I am _not_ extra weight over your shoulders."

They turned to me, surprised, and I felt Inner clap inside of me.

**Well, that was the closest thing in standing up for yourself in the longest time! Even if you did it to show your ex-friends that you care…**

And I did stand up, but just not for myself. I stood up to show that I was never the thing they carried over their shoulder like they thought. They said that I was something that they wanted to get rid of because of I was unnecessary. I never paid attention and I never cared for them.

But that wasn't true. I knew more about them then they know themselves.

I walked to Konan's familiar car, as she looked at me with eyes that seemed to read why I did what I did, and shook her head, as if in disappointment.

"I can read you more than you know that I can read. I might not know the whole story, but the reason of you standing up to Hidan wasn't for yourself, was it?"

And she was right. Because what I do now is never for myself.

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><p><em><strong>...Would Change Everything.<strong>_

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><p><em>Because What I never was Dead Weight,<em>

_I could Change_

_Because What I do now_

_I wouldn't do for myself_

_Because What I do Now,_

_I could Change Everything,_

_And Because What I was,_

_I was Myself,_

_I could Do It_

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><p><strong>Hey hey! Happy July 4<strong>**th**** if you guys are in America! Wanted to update as soon as possible, but I didn't have any inspiration and I realized that she still had to meet Hidan. I always thought that when she first met him, he would act "all that" and she would act like he was nothing. If he acted all that, he needed to be more than verbal. It just wouldn't be like him.**

**Tenten and Lee taught her how to fight with martial arts! And what's she talking about? Being deadweight? More on that later! I love to add history to a person! Makes them seem like a real person, not just a character!**

**QPAA:**

**Well, I am guessing I am good at writing, since you guys are talking about it, and I play basketball. I am good at drawing when it's something like a school project. It's like… "I have to be good!" but if it's not important, it's meh**

**Konan. She's kind and caring, but strong and I always wanted someone to teach me Origami! **

**I wouldn't have the courage, honestly. I would never be able to speak up and say "I am going to die 100 days from now." I wouldn't even be able to cut loose the ties. Yes, I am a selfish coward, but if I could, I would tell them and I would separate from them, but it's honestly because I am scared of losing what I have… I have never lost anything super important to valuable, and that's what makes me scared. I am ashamed to admit that I don't have the courage to say anything that would cause a loss.**

**Many people had different opinions on the last one, and I enjoyed hearing what all of you guys had to say!**

**Quick poll:**

**Does anyone fight, do martial arts, self defense, that is reading this? **

**If someone cussed the hell out of you, what would you do? (If someone went all Hidan on you, what would you do?)**

**Do your friends notice when something is wrong? When you are more moody or upset or sad, do they notice?**

**Do you like what I did to the design of the chapter? I made the name of the chapter with a "TitleTitleTitle..." and continued it with another "...[somethingsomethingsomething]" afterwards!**

**Thanks for reading! Reviews make my day, though since its July 4****th****, my day is already made! Sparklers! Have a good day guys! I hope you have a good one!**


	19. Day 12 Part 4: At Bay

**Man, it's hard having to stay in one day. One thing happens after another, and it's hard to remember that you have to continue on. Originally, this was supposed to be another day, but Konan is introducing her to some friends, apparently, and I can't leave that out. –sigh- I hate gathering people like this, it's so…clichéd. Oh wells, hope you don't mind. I will try to make it as normal as possible, with the same sad tone and at the same time, her being more happy. I also tried to add a tint of humor, try and catch some. Enjoy Reading!**

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><p><em><strong>Day 12 Part 4: At Bay<strong>_

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><p>The drive on the way back was silent, with the music turned on. Once in a while, we heard one of my songs, and I often startle from hearing myself, yet it wasn't sounding just like me. That's what happened when I started singing as Known Anonymous: my singing voice changed. Something with pride and complete bliss, with a tint of anger and sadness.<p>

"Do you not like her?" Konan struck the first conversation, as I knew she would. I would never start, but I couldn't stop her.

"Who?" I questioned innocently while she drove. Konan sighed before going on, still concentrated on the road.

"Known Anonymous. Do you not like her?"

"She's… okay. I like her I guess."

Konan nodded, still eyes on the road, and that's where our conversation ended. I saw the familiar peach house and the familiar rose bushes. They weren't exactly rose bushes, since when she gave up on growing them; she stuck origami roses in the bushes. I got out of the car as she places the rose in her hair in the bush.

She rushed me inside and started texting on her phone as I began to let my mind go astray.

Suddenly, I heard three, maybe four cars pull up in her driveway, as I begin to drown in despair. I wished I drove to school instead of walked so I had an excuse to get away. Meeting new people meant I had to make their acquaintance and making their acquaintance meant that they might, _might_ want to become my friend. I am not willing to make that risk.

Konan jumped up happily when the door rang. "They are finally here!" she exclaimed, as I put up my legs and hugged them. She trotted to the door quickly, and opened it casually, trying to pull it off cool.

"Hey, Konan," said a familiar, melodious voice. I grimaced as I realized who it was.

"Pein! And… the rest."

"Thanks a lot, bitch. Who was that pink-haired whore you were with?" the man I knew as Hidan spoke.

"Pink hair?" said another familiar voice in surprise, "Could you be talking about Pinky?"

"Her name is Sakura Haruno, I believe," said the first voice, Konan addressed as Pein.

"You guys already know her?" questioned Konan is surprise, but sounded awfully happy. She quickly rushed them in, as a headache was slowly forming.

"Sakura…Haruno?" questioned the Akasuna, his eyes widening, before they avert from me, slightly embarrassed that his façade came down for a second. But it came back as soon as it left.

"Pinky? Do you know Konan?" Kisame questioned.

"The question is, do you know her?" Konan said, sounding is slightly offended, but I knew she was faking the tone.

"Of course, Pinky is my friend!" Kisame argued with Konan as the rest were surprised.

"Friend?" the rest basically screamed, as I asked curiously. I wanted to scream as well, but my voice seemed to fade. The voice that seemed to always yell, scream, exclaim.

"This brat is your friend?" Sasori added, covering up what he really feels. I could see that he was hiding something, but what, I do not know.

I saw Pein look at me curiously, before turning away.

"This is no fair! Tobi never met Saku-chan!" a masked person yelled childishly, as he clinged to me, and began crying. Or so I guessed. I could hear the sobs, and I wondered how the water didn't flow out. "Why did Saku-chan never introduce herself to Tobi? Is Tobi a bad boy?" In the corner of my eye, I saw Itachi rub his head, as if trying to sooth a headache.

"There, there," I patted Tobi's head softly, as the rest of the people glanced at me curiously, "I never met these people, truly, besides the few. Tobi would never be a bad boy. Tobi's a good boy," I whispered softly in his ear as he stopped sobbing. I gave him a soft smile as the rest began murmuring. I cursed myself when I realized what I did.

"The brat is actually good with children?"

"That pink bitch doesn't find him annoying?"

I ignored them as I stared at Konan and Zetsu. They already knew, and both were grinning, about my smile. They knew that the few I have given them were fake. They knew, but they knew this one, this single smile, was real, and that's what's going to make a change.

**You know,** I felt Inner smile at _me_ softly, **I have been waiting for someone like him to come along. You always did smile when you saw children.**

And I knew she was right, but I wished I hadn't smiled. Because now, I want to smile again. I want to have a friend more than ever. I wanted to laugh everything off, feel excitement rush through me, and finally, share my world with people. But I knew, no matter how weak I am, I am strong enough to keep hiding it. I would be.

Even when they are crowding me, we come from different worlds. Even when they feel at ease with communicating with me after showing just a single smile at that damned Tobi, I knew that if I kept at a distance, they wouldn't grieve as much. If I don't let them come into my dark, dark, world, they wouldn't feel the difference.

At least, if I can keep them at a distance.

I will do my best to keep everything on my own, keep my feelings in check, keep my needs at bay. But if they do come from their own accord, the best thing I can do is hope they leave me before I die… just like my old friends.

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><p><em>Day 12 Part 4:<em>

_I try to keep them at bay,_

_My feelings, My urges_

_The need of Friendship,_

_The need of Love,_

_I keep them at a distance,_

_But if they are so in reach,_

_They could also reach me_

_How could I keep someone at bay,_

_If they are not willing to go along?_

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><p><strong>The Author is upset because she doesn't have the time to edit -.- The author is trying to be Tobi and talk in 3<strong>**rd**** person. Is the author doing a good job?**

**Hey Hey! Again, I am sorry for not updating for 3 days, but I do have some excuses, but enough of that. You have heard more than enough. I would like to announce to any of my readers that any story besides this one is up for adoption. This is my most read story, and this decided to announce it here. Any of them are up for takes, and you can change anything and everything, keeping only the plot. **

**The only one I am not giving up is Known Anonymous and Goddess of the Akatsuki, which is still on Hiatus until I figure out what to do with it. I am still researching, though I must say, there has been nothing useful to keep make it on plot. By the way, the Last Chance **_**may**_** be continued since it's only been the first chapter, and I have some thoughts on it. If anyone who reads bleach and likes HitsuHina and wants to test out SasoMomo, then go ahead and adopt it. I usually don't like the idea of giving out my stories for adoption, but it's either that, or keeping it on Hiatus until I finish this story. If you guys don't mind it going in Hiatus, then please be patient.**

**Congratualtions, to the ****theblackunend**** for being my 100****th**** reviewer, and she is getting a one-shot at any point of the story that makes sense to actually happen, as announced earlier.**

**I got 100 reviews! Hurray! My next goal is 200 by chapter 25, can you guys help me? I, of course, would update either way, whether I get a single review or 20 in one day, I would update the next time I have inspiration. Like before, the person will get a one-shot if they are the 200****th**** reviewer before chapter 25!**

**QPAA:**

**I do martial arts (tung so do) or I used to, I quit when I decided I wanted to focus more in school. I was a red belt, and three belt tests (a year or two, depends) before black**

**I would take it, honestly, but if it's friend I would either a: "_-chan has a potty mouth" or b: cuss at them too**

**I am overly happy, so if I am sad, it's too easy to detect, and they bother me till I am happy again**

**QP:**

**Have you ever met a group of people from a friend before? Like your friend introduces you to a big group of people? And did you ever know anyone in the group before your friend introduced you to those people?**

**How would you react to group of people you wanted to get away from if you were trapped in a room?**

**How would you try to convince your friend that you can't go to their house if you just don't want to go at the moment? Make an excuse, lie, or be blunt and say "I don't want to go"**

**I don't want to leave it off in a depressing note of giving up my stories for adoption (it makes me feel like I am putting babies I can't take care of for adoption: either let them suffer a life of not being cared for or giving it away) I wanted to say that the next chapter will be out most likely tomorrow since I have the idea of the next chapter!**


	20. Day 13: Is It?

**I had the brightest idea to what to do with Sasori and his past weirdness! Honestly, I was just doing random things, playing with characters, and then it was like BAM! RANDOM IDEA ATTACK! But unfortunately, it's the freaking weekend in the story, and she can't see him again till a fudging weekday! Anyways, enjoy reading!**

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><p><em><strong>Day 13: Is It?<strong>_

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><p>I walked to the gray house at the edge of the street. It was large, or at least larger than the small one story house I live in. I don't knock, because she always leaves her door open on the weekends. She believes that society is better than it is. She believes everything seems better than it is.<p>

"Suzume-obaa-sama? Tadaima!" I called out. This is my home. This is not my house, but my home.

"Is that you, Sakura?" the familiar, fragile voice said. She came downstairs without any assistance, as I knew she would shove me away. I knew that as fragile as she sounded, she was the strongest eighty years old there was. I smiled at her, her pink and white hair was still healthy, her blue eyes still lively, and her body still moving. "Sakura," she smiled at me, as I realized that she still had the same amount of wrinkles ten years ago. They were barely any. "Sakura, why don't I cook something for you?"

She didn't wait for my answer as I followed her in the kitchen. She would cook herself, do everything herself, believing that she was completely fine, even at her age. Maybe believing in that so much, she made that belief true.

I watched her prepare the same dish that she always cooked. One that I had learned to love.

"Suzuki style, Kare Raisu," she said, as I knew what she meant. Her daughter, my mother, favorite dish, the dish she learned to cook and ate every day. It was regular old curry rice with every topping she liked, and every topping that I used to hate.

She cooked in silence as I waited for my grandma to finish. She served the dish to me, smiling at me, waiting for me.

"Dig in! I can't have you singing for me with an empty stomach, now can I?" She gave me one of her fake smiles. The smile that I learned from her. I ate it slowly, as she watched my every move. I knew she was comparing me to my mother, but I didn't say anything.

"It wasn't your fault, you know?" she broke my train of thought.

"What's not my fault?" I offered her own smile. Her own fake one.

"Suzuki didn't die because of you." We both drop out acts, we both let our walls down for a while.

"What are you talking about? Is time catching up with you?" I tried to lighten the mood. Just for grandma. Just for her, I would joke. She was someone who needed to be lifted up.

"Your dad-"

"Father," I corrected her, as she nodded in understanding.

"Your father is at fault. He was driving me back from the airport, and we both heard it. We both heard the wheel make an odd sound."

I shook my head and smiled at her once more. Fake smiled.

"My mom would be alive if she didn't protect me."

Suzume-baa-sama shook her head, softly.

"I know you just want to place blame in your own shoulder. It's easier for you to place it on your own then accusing someone else. You get that from me. I apologize."

I finished up my rice as she looked at me sadly.

_It's easier for you to place it on your own then accusing someone. You get that from me. I apologize._

…_Then accusing someone. You get that from me. I apologize._

_You get that from me. I apologize._

_You get that from me._

_You get that from _me.

_Me._

What else could she carry over herself? Is it not enough her only grandson and daughter were taken from her? Was it not enough that her favorite grandchild died before she even saw him graduate, before he was even married? Was it not enough to carry the heavy burdens of loss? Is it not going to be enough to see her _last_ grandchild gone?

Is it not enough that _she_ has to hurt?

"Sakura?" Suzume-baa-sama called to me after she placed herself on the coach. She smiled and gestured for me to go over to her. "Sing me a song, won't you? A real one, like you used to , not the ones that come from the radio."

That's right, I even took away the singing she so dearly loved. The one that had such compassion and care to it. The slow ones that seemed to melt into your soul.

But I begin to sing anyways. As hard as I try to, I couldn't return it back to the soul touching voice that she loved so much. But I tried and tried. To return to her a bit of something that could be hers for a while.

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><p>"<em><strong>Was it not enough to make you mourn?<strong>_

_**Was it not enough to make you shed rain under your eyes?**_

_**Did I knock over something sacred?**_

_**Is it not enough?**_

_**Even with you losing everything,**_

_**Even with you and your fake smiles,**_

_**You still won't say it**_

_**You won't say 'Enough'**_

_**I won't say 'Enough'**_

_**Because I got it from you**_

_**Don't you see that it's enough?**_

_**Don't I see it's enough?**_

_**Stop! Stop! Stop!**_

_**Because we both know**_

_**It is not Enough**_

_**We don't have to ask any longer**_

_**Is it enough?**_

_**Is it not enough?"**_

* * *

><p><strong>Because it's not enough<strong>

_It's never enough._

* * *

><p><strong>Well, the song replaces the poem. Apparently, if you are somewhat good at poetry, doesn't mean you are good at song writing. It's short for a song, but like I said, I would only put a bit of a song and cut it off.<strong>

**Before I said I wanted 200 by chapter 25, that was a mistake. I meant day 25. But then I remembered their will be parts to the days. So that is means 250 reviews by day 25, and they'll get a oneshot! The next would be day 14, than the 'special' (oneshot) for ****theblackunend****!**

**Do you guys like the poems better, or the songs? This was a test chapter to see how it goes. **

**This idea came when I volunteered to go to a nursing home! I saw a lady who was singing really pretty like and she seemed stronger than the others. I really liked that lady. Tried to make Suzume-baa-sama like her, except with a sadder past. **

**QPAA**

**No, but if they did, well I hope they would be as hot as the Akatsuki :3**

**Er, I would call out rapists, and hopefully someone comes and gets me, and run out, and be all like "SUCKERS!" If I actually know them and they are from school, I'll just let the awkward silence happen**

**Make an excuse. Definitely not be blunt, unless I really don't like them**

**QP:**

**Sasori is getting attacked by termites. How do you react?**

**Itachi's house is getting infested by weasels and parrots. How do you help?**

**Do you know anyone that is stronger than their age? Like a little kid or old lady that are really independent and stuff? If so, what are your relations to that person?**

**I had no idea what to ask you guys, but I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Hope to see you guys reading again!**


	21. Day 14: I chose

**I shall not give up this story! It's been five days since I have updated, and I am losing time! I have to reach day 35 to make Sakura completely happy, and I am on day 14. I need 21 days to update if I update everyday! This sucks. I will never fufill my promise! Unless I update twice a day, and then maybe I could. But I still have parts. OMG THIS IS SO HARD TO MAKE HER HAPPY! And I lost what I was supposed to do, but I came up with another idea. So I will be updating twice today, maybe three times. And then maybe four if I finish all three before four PM because by then I have to read. I am trying to read a book a day for seven days to see if you read a book, do you dream more vividly. The reason? I hadn't had a dream since I stopped reading books a few months ago. The first time I read a book (a few weeks ago) I had a weird ass dream. Anyways, enjoy reading!**

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><p><em><strong>Day 14: I chose<strong>_

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><p>It was raining. Like any other early winter, it was raining. I was tired and everything was a blur. Everything seemed dreary, but it was my favorite. It truly was. I stayed home when father went out. Maybe to work, maybe to a bar, it didn't matter.<p>

That's why I was surprised when the doorbell rang.

I opened it without doubt, as my jaw dropped open.

"Yo," Shikamaru waved his hand up, "feeling up to some shogi?" He walked in without invite and passed me. I closed the door and followed him in.

"Shikamaru! What are you doing here?" I ask him, as he continued to my room. I didn't mind. He always was in my room.

"It's raining," he said plainly, "You haven't been coming over to watch the clouds or stars, and it was my job to come here when it rained."

I was surprised. Maybe even speechless, as he grabs the bored from under my bed.

"Who's making the first move?"

We played in silence. There must be a reason for why he came here. He might have never betrayed me, but he did distance himself. Why would he come so suddenly?

"Is there something wrong?" he blurted out. He started to just talk and talk. "I mean I see you at school, and I see that you still walk with confidence, but people pushed you down so many times. Then there is the fact that you didn't sign up for this year's talent show. I know because I am a part of the committee. You can still join, you know. You told me that you would finally show Ino and Naruto and Sasuke that you have talent in something, but you didn't so why not do it now? And don't worry about Karin, I don't like her, and neither does most of your friends. But it's not like they can betray her, and I can't really do anything, but she has nothing on me. Maybe you could do something, but you don't talk to anyone anymore. You have got to come over to my house more often, Sakura, I miss you, and I don't know if you miss me, but I miss you."

I just made my next move silently, as he sighed. He decided what to do, as I replied.

"Nothing is wrong. Yes I am pushed down, but if it's about withstanding, I can do that for a while. If you still want me to, I could sign up for the talent show, but the person who made that promise, the person who wanted to show her talent, is dead now, and the promise had withered. I don't mind signing up though. I know that I can still join. I don't need to show Ino or anyone else. I don't care if you guys dislike Karin, and I am glad for you that she hasn't gotten a hold on you. I can't talk to them now. Sure, I will go to your house, and the Sakura you are talking about missed you to. Maybe this Sakura wants to get to know you, maybe she doesn't."

He paused at his move, before he went on. He looked in my eyes, searching desperately.

"That Sakura hasn't died yet. She is hidden beneath a shell. She is trying to look for me know, but she can't see me yet. Sakura, my Sakura, _our_ Sakura, you wouldn't have died so easily."

I stood up angrily. His mouth dropped when I lift up my sleeve. It was scarred so much, it was hard to believe.

"_She_ wouldn't have died easily, but it wasn't easy. Do you know, Shikamaru, that she has seen things that no one else could withstand, and she is no exception, it was weird talking about me. No not me, it was weird talking about Sakura, "She has fought for herself, has taken many hits, been bullied since she was a child, and couldn't stand it. She died. She _died. _Get it through you smart ass brain. I am not the same Sakura you know. She has left the day her friends, her soldiers, her comrades, left her. And you can't make her come back. Not now, not ever."

He was frowning. He was suddenly as angry as I was. He stood up, and grabbed my wrist. I struggled, but his grip tightened.

"You're lying. If you were telling the truth, what is this bracelet you are wearing," I glance at my wrist. It was a blue and black butterfly, just hanging down, alone. "_I_ gave this to the old Sakura. The new one doesn't need this." I wanted to rip it away from my wrist, but I couldn't.

**Don't do that. It's precious, it is important.**

"What about that necklace hiding underneath your sweater. Don't think I can't see the chain. That's what Hinata gave you when you defended her. That was important to her, and that was important to the Old Sakura. It is important to you."

**I remember. She wanted to be your sister. She gave it to you so that even if you guys aren't related by blood, you guys will forever be sisters.**

It was a necklace of a diamond and an emerald. The diamond was whole, and the emerald was a crescent. I designed it as a child, she got it made, and kept it, only to give it to me when she needed the money the most. Subconsciously, I rubbed the jewel under my sweater with the free hand. It felt cool against my skin.

"Don't forget about the headpiece you wear to school every day. I recognize it. No one else does, but I do. When you wear it to school, when your hair is so long, it makes you look oriental. When your hair is short, it makes you look cute. People think you do this for attention, but you do it to feel close to your brother and mother. Am I wrong? The one thing your brother made for your mother, and the one thing she passed down onto you, you couldn't just not keep it. You kept it, even when you said this is a new Sakura. You are the same person."

I didn't realize I put it on every day. I felt incomplete without it, and I wore it in order to feel close to my mother and brother. Everything he said was true.

"And that picture on the wall. The one with you and Naruto and Sasuke, the one where you took a picture on sports day with Kakashi sensei. Your team leader. You would've taken that down to. The other one, the one at your desk, it's of you, Ino, and Tenten on festival day. Hinata was following Neji, and you three were wearing kimono's as little girls. The other one, by your bed, it was of Lee, Neji, you, and Kiba. They were fighting over who would get you on their basketball team. The one in the window sill is of you, Shino, Chouji, and me, just sitting there watching clouds. Don't forget, if you have really moved on, you would've taken these down. Have you? _No_. Sakura, you aren't honest with yourself. Do you want your friends back?"

Everything he is saying is so true. But he missed one brutal truth.

"Shika, you are speaking the truth. But it's not the matter if I want to, because I truly do. I want to do everything in my power to return things to they were. But can I? Am I allowed to? If I am, do I need it? I want friends, but what I need is not to have them."

He suddenly grinned at me. I was truly confused.

"You called me Shika. I completed what I wanted to do."

Then he left. He left me, and the unforgotten shogi board.

I saw what he did, how he made his move before he left. In chess terms, I guess what he has done was interesting.

_Checkmate._

And he did have a purpose here. He cornered me. He cornered be into rekindling our friendship. He has brought back every emotion I hid for so long, and made me think, just maybe, he became a friend again.

And he won the game. He drove me to the point where I am his friend again. Or somewhat. In his mind, I am a friend. I called him Shika once again.

_You called me Shika. I completed what I wanted to do._

He chose his words carefully. He said wanted, instead of needed. He wanted me as a friend, and he made me think that I could become a friend again. He told me that he had a choice. That _I_ have a choice.

There was one last thing. On his seat, he left a piece of paper. A talent show application. With my name on it. And I knew he planned at least half the things he said.

I took the paper, and smiled, so very softly, when I read the little note, in neat, small handwriting at the bottom of the page.

_Sorry, Saku, but you said you'd join, so join. Can't wait to see your audition._

The rat bastard. Trying to get me to make friends.

And I knew his purpose now. He wanted for me to rekindle a relationship.

And, maybe, it's a devil's temptation… or god's blessing.

Maybe its luck that he wanted to be my friend again… or it's meant to be.

Only time will tell, if I truly get a friend, or if I have to stay alone. If I truly actually get a friend, and it cures me, and hurts them, or if I have to stay alone and it breaks me and protects them.

But I know one thing. That this is my story. This is my choice. I choose what happens to me, _I _get to decide.

**But this is their story too.** **They have choices too.**

That is true, but as long as I am in charge of me, I am in charge of my walls. I could build them as many as times as I like, I could make them as strong as I like. I could let them in… or shove them away.

And for now, I shove them away.

Because this is my choice.

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><p><em>Day 14:<em>

_This is my story_

_This is my choice_

_Nothing you could do_

_Could change that fact_

_Because even if you have_

_Your own story to tell_

_I have mine_

_This is my life_

_And I chose this life_

* * *

><p><strong>This marks the end of introducing situations people and crap. Well, not all of it, but this is about it, and it won't be a continuous "meet this person, meet this person next, meet her, no meet him" anymore. I am tired, but I am going to get started on the next day as well.<strong>

**I am sorry for not updating for a five days, but I have been busy with school, and I also had no idea what to do for the Sunday. I have a slight idea what to do for Monday, though. And it's no longer going to be one-shot like. There will be times when you have to remember a situation, and not be reminded of what happens. **

**QPAA:**

**Panic, throw him in the swimming pool, if that doesn't work, call an exterminator and make sure to keep a bottle of repellents next time**

**Take them to my house, open a zoo especially for parrots and weasels, and put them for adoption.**

**My grandmas are mentally strong. I met a lady (my mom's customer/client thing) went skylining, even though she is 76.**

**QP:**

**What other animes do you watch?**

**What about manga?**

**Do you have any traditions with your friends?**

**Reviews? :3**


	22. theblackunend oneshot: SasoSaku

Oneshot: SasoSaku

* * *

><p><strong>theblackunend<strong>

* * *

><p>"<em>What's wrong with getting close?" <em>he said.

"_What's so bad about getting friends?"_

"_Why do you keep distancing yourself?"_

Everything is wrong about getting close, Shika. What's so bad? If I get close to others, I would, undoubtingly, hurt them. I keep distancing myself because _you_ people keep coming closer. What choice do I have but separate myself?

"Is that all you do all day? Write in your journal?" a voice came to me as I shut this journal. I glanced behind me to see the voice, as I sighed in relief.

"It's just you, Sasori-san." He frowned at me when I said that.

"Just me? Sasori-_san_? What am I to you?" he asked me, quite angrily I might add.

"I just thought you were someone else, like Shikamaru or Naruto, Sasori-san." He sighed, slightly giving up. He mumbled something to himself, before taking a deep breath.

"You don't have to call me –san, you know. At least call me Sasori," he sat beside me. I pull up my knees to my chest and hug them.

"I know," I murmured into the knees, "I am just used to calling people –san, you know? But it's weird. When I call you –san, it just seems odd. Maybe I should call you Danna," I said the last part jokingly, but he frowned nonetheless.

"Don't think of comparing me to that brat, little girl," he said as I laughed a bit.

"Little girl? Are you still calling me that?" I questioned him. He didn't seem to mind.

"You just seem lonely, scribbling down things in your journal all the time," he said, as I subconsciously pushed the journal further from his view. He didn't seem to notice. "You should hang out with us more; maybe not even us, with someone."

I sighed. Another person who wants me to get closer to someone. I got up and packed my bags as he just looked at me curiously. I double checked to be sure that this journal was in the bag before I turn back to him.

"I'll be leaving now. I have some dancing lessons I have to get to." He nodded, as he got up too.

"I'll walk you there," he said, as I shook my head.

"It's fine, it's nearby anyways, and besides, it's a private building," I said, hoping he would give up, "I am not allowed to show anyone where it is anyways."

"It doesn't matter, no one would know," he said it as if we were doing a crime. Persistent bastard.

"It's fine, really, I could walk myself."

"No, you can't. I have seen firsthand how people say things, believe things, and it turns out different."

My eyes softened, just the tiniest, bit, at his tone. I felt sorry for him, and I sighed.

"Fine, but you will only walk halfway," I said with a final tone.

"Three-fourths."

"Deal."

_**xXxKnownXAnonymousxXx**_

It started out as just a walk. One single walk to dance class led to walking many times. He would walk me three-fourths of the way before he turned around to get back home.

I couldn't help but notice small details about him, like how if I was even a minute late, his nose would wrinkle in worry. Like how when we were standing, I had two inches over him, but when we were sitting, he was the same height. Like how whenever I came by the gate where we met, he had to ask before he walked me. I couldn't tell him no, but it wasn't like I could get close to him.

I started to _not_ meet up with him, and take a different path. The longer one. I would run my way there, in case he would chase me. I would go out of my ways to go around the path I showed him, but he still managed to catch up with me, each time with masked hurt in his eyes.

"Why didn't you tell me that you wanted to go a different way? You should've told me so I could make sure you are okay, little girl."

Each time I would tell him that I wasn't a little girl, and that I could take care of myself without him watching me all the time. He would just stare at me with hurt written in his face, just barely masked, before he would turn away and walk away.

He still met up with me even after our little 'fight'. It wasn't that I didn't want to talk to him. I did. I just didn't want to get close in the process.

_**xXxKnownXAnonymousxXx**_

He never stopped checking on me. In fact, when the last bell rang, he would dash from his side of the building, to mine, to see if he could catch me leaving and follow me instead. He must've felt it his responsibility over me when _that_ happened. From back then, to a time I can't remember.

I shut off the memory, and when the final bell rings, I dash out of the room, trying to rush away before he came, just to see that he was already there, smirking at me.

"My class was let out early," he said, emphasizing the 'me' as if he was gloating. "Let's go, little brat." I let out a humorless laugh.

"Little brat? Is that a downgrade from Little Girl?" He chuckled a bit as well, as I calculated if I could get away, and how much time I had. I damned my pink hair. If I didn't have it, I could've blended in the crowd.

"Don't even bother," he said, as if reading my mind, "Even without your pink hair, you would stand out too much to me."

I sighed, as I knew he was correct. Even when I had my hood up, he seemed to find me no problem.

I sighed as he dragged me away, taking our original path. He suddenly grabbed my hand in his, as I was startled.

He leaned in to whisper in my ear, "Act normal, Sakura." I immediately stiffen, before acting as if nothing was wrong. He never uses my name unless he was serious. I walk on, and pretend to giggle, since he just whispered in my ear.

"You're so funny, Sori-kun," I say like a girly girl. Once we turned around the block, he quickly let go of my hand and sighed. I stomped on his foot, as he winced in pain.

"What was that all about?" he asked me angrily.

"What was _that_ all about?" I gesture my hands to point out what I said. He didn't look angry anymore, and stuffed his hands in his pocket.

"What if I said I just wanted to act like a couple?" he said with a straight face.

"I'd say 'Aw, that's so swe-' Bullshit." He winced at my tone, and straightened out before sighing and moving on.

"The guys on the opposite side of the street were watching you," he started, as I raised my eyebrow, "They are a part of a gang in town, and they ambush girls for… well, you know. And they followed us for three blocks. They wouldn't aim for you if you had a boyfriend with you, and I had to do something."

"Are you joking with me?" I said, not quite sure I believe his story.

"Believe me or not, but I think it's safer if I walk you the rest of the way." I shook my head.

"Is this what this lie is about? You want to follow me all the way there?"

"What? No! I wouldn't have requested to follow you there if I truly thought something was wrong!" he yelled.

"Whatever," I walked faster, before turning around, "You should go home."

"What?"

"You heard me: Leave."

And he did. And he didn't come back to check on me the next day. Or the next. Or any of the others. I was glad that now, I could let the small, formed, bond wither away, before it progressed to anything more than a little friendship.

But I would be lying if I didn't say I was lonely.

_**xXxKnownXAnonymousxXx**_

It was like any other walk. Except this time, I felt like someone was watching me. And this time, I didn't have Sasori. I glanced back a couple of times, but never have I seen anyone.

At least, not until I turned around the corner, and someone grabbed my mouth. I quick their shin with momentum, and they let me go. I don't bother staying and fighting like an noble person would, but run. I knew my survival instincts, and I knew when I actually had a chance of winning. Unlike Hidan, this guy isn't sixteen. He was in his youths, yes, but older then Hidan, and probably a twenty or thirty year old.

He seemed to be on something, as well, because he seemed to think he was superman. I rack my brain for drug's ed to remember what the drug was called. Meth? Heroin? I can't remember, but I just know that he is chasing me, and he seems to not care that he was just kicked in the shin with all my strength.

Suddenly, I heard a cracking noise. I glance quickly, and see the man on the floor, but he is quickly getting up. I see Sasori, his fist bloodied, as he stood in rage.

I notice Kisame, as well as Pein, who were jumping to hold the man back. I see that Konan and Hidan are also coming, and the rest of the Akatsuki coming. I also see Shikamaru and Gaara rushing over, but Shikamaru seems to be busy calling for someone. I heard something about calling the police, about how a crazy man tried to attack his friend, but pay no mind to it.

I just knew that I could've died today, and not on my 100th day schedule.

I feel myself shake, and once again, life has taken me on another trip of surprise. It was planning to end my life sooner, and I would be lying if I said that I wasn't scared.

I felt arms wrap around me, as I cried into the chest.

"My god, Sakura, you had us worried. I was just able to convince them to come over, and we saw you being ambushed by the man."

I looked up to him, tears still rolling down my eyes.

"I was worried, and you didn't even bother asking someone else to walk you," he started rambling on before he met my eyes. When he looked down, he went quiet, and instead of talking, I felt his lips on mine. I couldn't help but cry, and cry, as my tears melted into the salty, passionate kiss.

"Man, he's so lucky that he gets to kiss Sakura-chan. I guess Danna did deserve her kiss though, un."

"Quiet. She deserves a god, not Sasori, but if she's happier with him, then so be it."

"I was so scared," I whispered into his chest once we dropped the kiss.

"I know," he whispered back, "but I am here now. I am here, and you can cry on my…you can cry on _our_ shoulders."

And I just remembered my goal of not being close. But would I be able to separate myself now? Would I be able to even stay away from the Akatsuki, not to mention, Sasori?"

And the answer is no.

And maybe that's okay. Because even if I die, they would get over it. And I would die happy. And he will be okay.

Maybe it's okay to be happy.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Because I deserve to be Happy. Everyone deserves to be happy.<strong>_

* * *

><p><em>Maybe they could handle sadness<em>

_Bear the burden just for a while_

_So I don't have to take it to my grave,_

_For they are the ones who chased me,_

_Not the other way around,_

_So in the stead of taking pain to my death,_

_Instead, bring with me Happiness and bliss_

_I knew that they would get over the pain_

_So maybe, just maybe, it's okay to be happy_

_It's okay to be happy with him._

* * *

><p><strong>I admit, I didn't edit it, so it's not going to sound angst like, since I have to edit it in order to make it like it. But here you go. Since this is not a chapter, I will not put a QP nor my answers, but I would still ask you to review! This is dedicated to theblackunend, my 100<strong>**th**** review, who asked for either PeinSaku or SasoSaku, and I also asked what she wanted in the story. So I put it in, and hopefully, this suits her interest! I didn't want to make it completely dark, so I tried to add some humor in it, for celebration! Though, huumour is not my strong suit… Reviews? **


	23. Day 15 part 1: A Laugh

**I know I promised she wouldn't meet anyone new, but I need Kankuro a part of this story. Part two of the story is up! Enjoy reading!**

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><p><em><strong>Part 2: And so They came Closer<strong>_

* * *

><p><em><strong>Day 15 part 1: A Laugh<strong>_

I dropped the audition slip in the box hesitantly, as a voice jerked me.

"Psh, Pinky is auditioning? She won't compare to me," this voice said Pinky like an insult, so mean like, that I got angry. Unlike when Kisame says it jokingly, this person was saying it as if it was the worst insult said. I hold it in grudgingly, to not whip out at Karin. I could feel Inner shift uncomfortably, as if saying that she is not used to hiding her emotions.

**Do something. Don't just stand there; Do something!**

I just stood there for a while, as Karin and her group, my friends, **my old friends**, my friends pass me, but not before she shoved me forward. I stumble awkwardly, before helping myself up. My eyes haze a bit, one of the dizzy spells I get ever since I got sick.

A sickness that would ultimately cause my death.

"Yo, Sak, you okay?" a distant voice came to me. I felt a soft hand on my back, as I realized the person wasn't as distant as it sounded.

"I'm fine," I gritted my teeth, knocking away their arm as they tried to help me up.

"Do you not remember me? I'm Temari," the voice started to sound more feminine, as I remembered the blonde in the mall.

"I remember, but as for now, could you help me to the nurse's office?" I asked her.

"I have a better idea," I could hear her smile in her voice, "Why don't we ditch class for today, and we could head over to my place. My little bros are ditching too, so we won't be lonely." I almost groaned at the idea of company, but I didn't want to go to the nurses' office again. It would be the seventh time this month. I knew they might get suspicious and look up my record, so I answered the only reasonable answer.

"Sure."

_xXx__**Known**__X__**Anonymous**__xXx_

I followed her through her house, as she just sat down. Suddenly, a guy popped out and seemed to not notice me.

"Hey, Tem, where is the cereal?" he asked. Suddenly, his eyes rolled over to me, and he straightened out.

"Hello, beautiful," he said, as if he rehearsed the lines, "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?"

"Leave her alone, Kanky, this is not a girl I want you messing with," she stifled her laugh. He continued to attack me with pickup lines however. I admit that I am very much amused.

"I'm writing a paper on the finer things in like, and I was wondering if I could interview you," he said, as I looked at him with a blank face. Temari let out a blown out laugh, as I was not used to, since in school, there were only polite giggles coming from the girls. It was refreshing.

"Your daddy must be a terrorist, because baby- you da bomb!" Temari just continued laughing, as I cracked a smile. A small one, but a smile, nonetheless.

"If you were a booger, I would pick you first." The smile grew.

"I hope you know CPR because you take my breath away." And grew.

"Nice to meet you! I am Kankuro, and you are gorgeous." And grew.

"I really don't know if your beautiful or not, because I haven't gotten past your eyes yet." And grew till my face hurt.

"It's not rape, its forced pleasure." And I just let out the largest laugh I could. Temari and I just rolled on our backs, laughing, me, forgetting about anything that has happened, that _will_ happen, and continued laughing.

Kankuro was laughing as well, as he helped both me and Temari from out seats. Temari, however, pulled him down with us, as he fell over, on top of us, as we all just laughed.

It was fun till a certain voice had stopped us in our tracks.

"What the hell is going on here?"

And the two siblings froze, as I glanced at the familiar voice. I heard the two siblings squeak.

"H-hey Gaara."

* * *

><p><em>Day 15<em>

_A Laugh_

_An uncontained smile_

_A thing brighter than the sun_

_And louder than chirping birds_

_And an uncontrollable joy_

_A Laugh_

* * *

><p><strong>Okay, since this is enough polling (5 days) I will do one last one. I am going to end all my polls with these questions, just because I find that knowing what you guys like best is important.<strong>

**QPAA:**

**Kuroshitsuji (just started), MaidSama! OHHC, Dog Days, Hidan no Aria, Fairy Tail, Bleach. The list goes on.**

**Same as the list above (yes I read and watch)**

**I used to, me and my friend would call each other and talk about everything in 3****rd**** grade at exactly 6:23 and stuff. Now, instead, we just meet each other at school the same day every day.**

**QP:**

**What's your favorite chapter? Please don't answer 'I don't know' because I really like to know. **

**Has did story ever made you cry? If so, which chapters? If not, well, whatever, there's not much you can add to your answer xD**

**Which was your favorite poem?**

**Anonymous reviewer, random fandom: No, it's not, unless people vote for it. This story is for the readers' entertainment, and my venting, not for shipping purposes, so I will not just make it a SasoSaku just because I am a fan. **

**As of now, it's going to be time for voting.**

**(Yes I did include the people who voted more than once, just not the one the one guest reviewer who reviewed PeinSaku four times in the same hour or so. I did include their vote though) **

**PeinSaku: 6 (I never suspected this xD)**

**SasoSaku: 5 (most surprised because last time I checked…. It was at 0 xD)**

**GaaSaku: 4 (Maybe it's because it's in the AkaSaku section… should I move it back to just Sakura?)**

**DeiSaku: 4 (the following three weren't even in the poll xD but go ahead and vote for them, I'll think of something)**

**ItaSaku: 5**

**Kisasaku: 1**

**Harem (usually I prefer one on one relationships, but yeah): 2**

**The rest will be released on Day 20. Feel free to vote every **_**new**_** chapter. Maybe I should just make a poll and put it on my account page. Some of you guys had said a pairing in your messages, so I will be sure to look them up again and recount. Though my head is already filled with numbers -.- Honestly, this is going to get harder to write, since now that I am used to dark writing (yes I refer the past chapters as dark, I don't know if you do) it's hard to make them get closer with dark writing, but if I don't add it, it sounds weird, because I am not used to this writing. Please bear with me for a few chapters, I hope to improve.**

**Reviews? Votes? Please?**


	24. Day 15 part 2: Safety's Exchange

**Enjoy reading!**

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><p><em><strong>Day 15 part 2: Safety's Secret<strong>_

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><p>"What the hell is going on here?"<p>

Temari and Kankuro immediately stopped laughing, stiffening next to me. Time froze as they face him, scared. They got up, and tried to calm him down.

"H-Hey Gaara."

"What is _she_ doing here," Gaara pointed at me, torn between disgusted, interest, and nonchalant.

"She's my friend, Gaara," Temari tried to say calmly, her voice a pitch higher.

Gaara's their sibling….why are they so scared of him?

"Friend?" he tilted his head, almost, just almost, cutely. "Why would we need friends here? We're leaving again no matter how you look at it. We'll most likely be kicked out once again and be forced to move."

They still were afraid, but they seemed to calm down more.

"You seem to be in a good mood today, Gaara," Temari smiled at him. "Did something happen?"

"Seems like he met a girl," Kankuro winked at him. Suddenly, Temari seemed to remember that I was here.

"Oh, Gaara, this is-"

"Haruno Sakura," Gaara interjected, "Part of the Astrology, Dancing, Drama, and Archery club, used to be in cooking. Took martial arts along her fellow past friends, and often got into street fights, for example, with Zaku, Dosu, and Kin. I know her. Her file was merged with Known Anonymous's." Temari groaned.

"Gaara, you are not supposed to look through her file even if it was merged together!" Gaara just shrugged.

"She interests me."

Kankuro and Temari exchanged a glance, before Kankuro took Gaara upstairs.

"Sorry about that Sakura," Temari rubbed her head sheepishly, the action reminding me of Naruto. "Gaara's not exactly what you call sane…or safe."

"Why are you and Kankuro scared of him?" I asked bluntly. She looked surprised for a moment, and sighed.

"We're not scared of him."

"Right. You're terrified of him." She flinched at my words, before continuing.

"We really do love him. We do. But he makes it so hard for us sometimes. It's hard to love someone when you fear them," Temari's eyes seemed to drift off.

"Fear is not the opposite of love, Temari. You can fear someone and love them so much." _Like mother loved father. Like how she love_s_ him._

"I know that," she sighed, before perking up. "Let's go outside, Sakura!" she forced the cheerfulness into her voice. I let her drag me into their backyard, before she turned around to me.

"Sakura," she suddenly said seriously. "Stay away from Gaara."

"What-"

"Listen to me. Do not do anything peculiar. Do not do anything attention grabbing like you did when you fought that Hidan guy."

"You saw that?" I asked, slightly embarrassed.

"We all did, and so did part of the Akatsuki. If you suddenly interest them, you have more than enough to interest Gaara. Stay away from them. Do not be alone all the time, and don't make Gaara think he's similar to you."

"Similar? How?" How was I similar to Gaara at all?

"Do not make him believe you are alone."

Alone. The words ran cold into my veins, as my heart hammered in my chest. That's what I needed. That's what I want to be before I go off. Why couldn't I be alone? It would be much better for everyone else.

"And most of all, get rid of your low self-esteem. If you don't, then the rest would be pointless. Don't slouch the way you do, don't frown whenever you notice that you're different, and don't think that you're ugly."

Do I still think like that? I got rid of that a while ago. But somehow, I felt as if I did think I was ugly, I just couldn't catch my thoughts.

"Why are you telling me all of this?"

"Why is not important."

"But it's a good thing to know.

"It's a secret."

"Why?"

"For your safety," she looked into my eyes with determination that I have not yet seen since then. "It's best for you to not know, and go home."

* * *

><p><em>Day 15 part 2:<em>

_Safeties and secrets_

_Seem to come hand in hand_

_They should be safe from my secret_

_They shouldn't be hurt my disappearance_

_Just like my safety_

_Is put on the line_

_Over a secret_

_But now, as biased as this is_

_I will find the secret_

_In the risk of my safety_

* * *

><p><strong>I am SUPER DUPER UBER SORRY! I lost track of time when I started making my cousin's presents for their birthday, and it past, what, TEN FRICKING DAYS! I AM SUPER SORRY! <strong>

**Anyways, I am just going to put this out there. I am tired of getting anonymous reviewers without a name. I don't mind Guest, but too many people used it. How am I supposed to appropriately thank you guys later? Therefore, I came up with a solution: Anyone who doesn't have a name or uses Guest for the Anonymous Reviews vote will count only once, but anyone who has a name (like randomfandom and and Anon) will have two, including those who have real accounts. Originally, people who have accounts would have three points for their vote, but I thought that was WAY too much, and ItaSaku would lose to quicky (all my anonymous reviewers with the exeption of another user are the only ItaSaku voters) The last chapter, everyone has one vote, but I am starting this now. Better come up with a name if you want you're pairing to win! :D**

**I don't care if you vote for more than one person.**

**PeinSaku: 8 (oh no! it's slowly stopping! Vote! Vote!)**

**SasoSaku: 8 (:3 still my favorite paring no matter what)**

**GaaSaku: 5 (Maybe it's because it's in the AkaSaku section… should I move it back to just Sakura?)**

**DeiSaku: 4 (the following three weren't even in the poll xD but go ahead and vote for them, I'll think of something)**

**ItaSaku: 14 (you anonymous reviewers…there are too many of you xD)**

**Kisasaku: 1**

**Harem: 3**

**Those passionate about their pairings would have vote for their favorite the last chapter, is voting while reading this, and is prepared to vote again the next chapter xD**

**Peace!**


	25. Day 16: A Gamble

**This is short… But I needed to show that Gaara is actually interested, not just saying that, and needed to show why she is willing to get closer to Gaara. I am so sorry for making it short, but my English teacher said that your work is only accepted if it's quality work, no matter the length. Doesn't matter if it's short, as long as it is good, and do not drag it out just for the limit if you think that it will make it worse. Enjoy reading!**

_**Day 16: A Gamble; A risk**_

"Hey," Shikamaru dropped down on the seat next to me, smirking. "Saw you're audition slip. So you're good at singing? Figures."

I scribbled down my final words on the journal, and ignored him when I put it away.

"That's not going to work you know. I can handle the silent treatment. I can deal."

I sighed and put down my arms.

"Shika, you should go before Karin sees you. You know that if you do this, you might make her anger worse than it is."

"Yeah right, its anger that bothers her," Shikamaru rolled his eyes in sarcasm.

"What do you mean?" I asked him, curiously.

"Never mind. You don't need to know now."

I won't know, ever. If I don't know now, I won't ever find out. But that's okay. I don't need to know the reason why I am miserable, and neither do I need the reason why my friends won't be miserable.

"Get out of my seat."

I looked up at Gaara, as I remembered his sister's words. _I won't be protected when I am the one who should be doing the protecting._

"Troublesome," Shikamaru sighed. "Why don't you just sit next to Ino or something. Take my spot."

"No." Gaara said with finality. Shikamaru raised an eyebrow as I stare at the exchange.

"And why is that?"

"Because next to Ino, there is no Sakura."

He said it so bluntly, so emotionless, that it took Shikamaru a while to process it. His eyes grew wide for a second, but returned to normal.

"And why do you need to be with Sakura?" Shikamaru inched towards me. I saw Gaara's eyes narrow.

"Because she interests me." Gaara just shrugged, as if this was a normal thing to say.

"Well for your information," Shikamaru started, as I wondered how he would counter back. "She is not interested in you. You're no Nagato, nor are you a Sasuke."

Gaara titled his head as I cringed at those two names.

"That's not true. She is interested. See the way her stomach gets tucked in? That means that she is interested. Basic body language."

"Am I interested?" I raised my eyebrow, glancing at Shikamaru, before realizing that he was no longer close to me, physically or emotionally. "I don't believe so, Gaara. I know nothing about you, and you know nothing about me. But I will learn, not because I am interested, but because with that knowledge, I might understand you better."

"Sakura, what are you saying?" Shikamaru questioned curiously. "You're willing to draw him in?" he whispered in my ear.

"Of course I am. If he tries to get more information out of me, it's easier to get information from him."

I just have to find out how to do this without getting close. Quenching all he want to know about me, before disappearing, and hopefully, when he gets uninterested, he will detach from that interest in me, and he won't feel anything when I disappear. Maybe if I learn more about him, I could prevent him getting closer. Use the knowledge against him.

Gaara is coming closer, coming into the danger zone. But once he completes what he wants, once he gets what he wants, he will have a choice to leave my life all together. And even though it's a gamble, it's easier then forcing him away, causing more reason to be interested. It's a gamble, a risk, that I am willing to take.

_Day 16:_

_A gamble_

_A risk_

_One that would have_

_The best outcome_

_Where he leaves on his own will_

_Or the worst_

_Where he stays by my side_

_Even after he has what he wants_

**PeinSaku: 21 (found out that they are lots of fan of this pairing :3 love that fact)**

**SasoSaku: 18 (C'mon guys! You can do it! Don't let ItaSaku beat you guys, and you're so close to Pein!)**

**GaaSaku: 7 (Maybe it's because it's in the AkaSaku section… should I move it back to just Sakura?) (slowly rising…vote for this to save GaaSaku!)**

**DeiSaku: 6 (the following three weren't even in the poll xD but go ahead and vote for them, I'll think of something)**

**ItaSaku: 15 (-_- seriously, Guest, if you really want ItaSaku, you'd get a name xD though there is too much of you to count at times)**

**Kisasaku: 1**

**Harem: 6**

**Wish my cousin a happy birthday! (if you are in the same time-zone xD it's her birthday for another 3 hours or so.) **

**And the next three chapters are dedicated to getting closer to the Sabuku's. I need her to get closer to them before the Akatsuki. I really do…sorry! Wait till then!**

**Review! And don't forget to vote!**


	26. Day 16 Part 2: Push and Pull

**Enjoy reading!**

_**Day 16 part 2: The Push and Pull Project**_

"Sakura," Konan threw me a smile, as I plopped onto the seat. I nodded at her, as her smile faded.

"Sup, Sak," Deidara sat into the seat in front of me.

"Hey," Sasori said, going on the other side of me.

"Seriously, where do you all come from? Last time you were on the other side of the room."

"It's not our fault," Deidara smirked at me. "That you're so interesting. Are you Sasori's everlasting art, or my exploding one?"

"Neither," I said, "I am not art."

**That's a lie.**

_It's not. Everyone's life is art._

**That's not what I meant.**

"That's where you are wrong, Sakura," Sasori said, also smirking, "You will either forever embed in our memory, or stick with us forever. We couldn't forget you if we tried."

"Well," Konan interjected, "If that's true, then I will hope that she's Sasori's." She paused to think about it, "Sasori's art, I mean, not Sasori's."

My life is art, but not me, exactly. To become one is a difficult thing to do,

"If I were to be art, I would have to be unforgettable."

"You are."

I turned to the voice and almost groaned. He _again?_

"Hey Gaara. When did you join art?" I asked, pretending to be slightly interested and curios.

"I ditch a lot. You wouldn't have seen me if I wasn't trying to figure you out," he said with a blank face. "They're right you know. You are art; we just have to figure out which one."

"And when we do," Konan said, "When we find out…"

"We will make sure to make you either stay as long as possible," Sasori continued for Konan.

"Or make sure you stay forever in our memory," Deidara finished. I looked at the four of them, before thinking of a reply. Looking at Gaara first, I opened my mouth for a reply.

"There is nothing for you to figure out. I am not art, and if I am, I already know which type I would be. There's not much to find out, Konan, and I wouldn't stay for very long, in your memory or in person. That's all there is to it. If I was art, I would be the forgettable type. Go ahead and try to figure me out. There is nothing to really solve."

I expected them to back off, or at least look the slightest bit disappointed, but if anything, they looked ready to take a challenge. They looked arrogantly at me, with a smirk touching all of their lips.

"Kankuro and Temari was right. Taking art with them would be more fun than I would have thought. I will figure you out, Haruno. I will find out why you deny yourself, why your eyes are broken, and why everything you do is contradictory to everything I know," he said, his eyes gazing into mine, trying to pry something out of them, with his bare gaze. I held my ground, not bothering to turn from him. I stared right back at him, except it wasn't me challenging him, or taunting him. That was his doing. Right now, I am accepting the challenge, ignoring the hidden taunts, and confirming that I know what I am doing, and I know what I am.

"You know," Konan said, making me break my staring contest with the redhead. "Sakura, I have known you for a long time. I still haven't figured you out, the way you can read someone as easily as an open book, but never acknowledging that you can do that. I might have not been close enough to you to know about whatever happened, but I will discover it. Whatever that might've caused you to be like this, even before _their _betrayal, before I have known you, that's where it lies, isn't it? Why you seem so much more mature then the rest of us. I will figure it out, what caused you so much pain. I will find out how I could heal you, how I could save you. I promise you that, Sakura. I will save you from the pain."

Deidara smiled at me bright in agreement, and Sasori smirked knowingly. More knowingly then I would think. Though what could he know? He was just another guy.

I sighed. There was nothing I could do to make their interest go away. I was thinking of other tactics, like the push and pull one, but there was not much I could do with that. It's worth a shot, however, and it would take a while to accomplish.

Phase 1: Get Closer to Select Three People. Act like You Want Them Closer.

Phase 2: Try to Pull Them In. If you Tug Hard Enough, They'll want to Push Away

Phase 3: If they haven't Pushed Away Yet, You act Like You are a Fan Girl and that Will hopefully be Enough

Phase 4: If that hadn't worked, Follow them Everywhere. They'll get Annoyed and Push You Away.

Rinse and Repeat with another 3 people.

That was the plan anyway. Get close with three people, act like you get closer, and keep pulling them in, so they'll push you away.

The only problem is how to get closer…Without actually feeling attached to the three.

_Day 16 part 2_

_To Pull Them In_

_So They'll Push Themselves out_

_But How to Do This_

_Without Hurting Myself _

_In the Process_

**I don't mean to use excuses, but it's been a busy week last week:**

**Four birthday parties with another one coming up, A day at the beach, taking care of my baby cousin's, making out 'traditional' videoes with my cousin (we make random videos whenever she comes over), getting super sick, swimming every day, and finally going back into summer school. Yeah it's been a lot of work, trying to make space for writing, and it **_**is**_** awfully short, but I wanted to introduce this thing, but I didn't want to waste a whole day on it. Introducing: THE PUSH AND PULL PROJECT! I have never actually tried this myself, but in theory, it works. I don't really know if I want to try it.**

**As for the people she chooses to test it out, it's for her to know, and us to find out. I haven't exactly decided, and Sakura is the smart one, so I'll have to think it over, and come up with some logic for her answers.**

**And also, Sasori **_**is **_**doing this for a reason. I am not trying to hint to anything other then what he may or may not know, so that's why I am using him so much.**

**And for Pein, he will be coming up soon, since he is winning in the poll. Unless Itachi or Sasori make a comeback that is. Whatever happens is in the hands of the poll :D So Vote NOW!**

**PeinSaku: 37 (Woah. I guess I should add some moments between them after a few days)**

**SasoSaku: 30 (C'mon guys! If you let them beat you, then I won't add too many moments between them and that tortures me too DX)**

**GaaSaku: 13 (Maybe it's because it's in the AkaSaku section… should I move it back to just Sakura?) (slowly rising…vote for this to save GaaSaku! PLEASE! LOVE THE REDHEAD, CUTIE THAT WILL BE HERE FOR THE NEXT FEW CHAPTERS!)**

**DeiSaku: 10 (the following three weren't even in the poll xD but go ahead and vote for them, I'll think of something)**

**ItaSaku: 17 (-_- seriously, Guest, if you really want ItaSaku, you'd get a name xD though there is too much of you to count at times)**

**Kisasaku: 3**

**Harem: 14**

**Haremplz: the kiss with Sasori was a oneshot dedicated to theblackunend. She is my 100****th**** reviewer and my 250****th**** will also get one! So if you think that is part of the storyline, please don't. It's also different from the rest of the chapters, where it goes day by day, the one-shot included more than one day.**

**I also want to mention that I finally got over 200 reviews! If I can get 48 more before Day 25, I'll put up another oneshot dedicated to whoever is the 250th reviewer, as long as I can PM you! Unless you are an anonymous reviewer, which then I have to figure out what to do myself, but that's fine either way! **

**Review? Don't forget to vote! **


	27. Day 17: Yet Another Choice

**This didn't turn out the way I wanted. I am quite upset with this chapter, and did my best to fix it, but I am quite angry with it. I didn't want to give you something I half-assed, but I really wanted to show you how there dancing and singing lesson goes, as well as Kakuzu's part of the story, besides being her dad. I still think this is nowhere near what you guys deserve to read (as in, I think this chapter is terrible, and I think you guys deserve better), but I hope you Enjoy Reading anyways.**

* * *

><p><em><strong>Day 17: Yet Another Choice (Courage or Coward)<strong>_

* * *

><p>I was panting hard, trying to dance up to the rhythm. It seemed so much easier when Gaara performed, but I guess it's because he's been doing that dace for months, whereas I have barely learned the song.<p>

"No, no, no! I want you to show off your hands, not your legs! Curve them more. And don't move your legs! They were perfect where they were!" one of the two dance instructors yelled at me. Gaara just looked at me with interest, not even trying to hide his amusement.

"Gaara, show her how it's done," the second one not even bothering to show me what he caught wrong. "Show her the male lead part, and then the female."

Gaara grunted before taking the dance 'floor'. It was in actuality gymnastics matt, spread around everywhere, since we needed all the space we could. With all the flips we did, we do need the matts, or else we could just crack our heads open.

This dance was based off of martial arts, so it was fairly easier for me than any other dancer, but the moves were complex, and you needed all the components of both dancing and fighting arts. You needed to be swift, full of grace, power, fluid, yet crisp movements. At one point, you are dancing in the arms of a man, hugging tightly, and the next, you push them away.

The song was a ballad about a seductress, falling in love with a man she was ordered to kill. The man didn't love her as much as she did, so when he found out she was from the enemy, he tried to kill her. The lady did her best to defend herself without hurting the other, but in the end, it was to kill or be killed. In the end, I would have to slam Gaara on the back, and face him one more time, where I would have to kiss him, or supposedly so. It blacks out in the end, a black screen, with blood stains, right before our lips make contact, therefore making sure I don't actually have to kiss him.

He somehow was able to have all the power and grace and even more, and he seemed to actually be dancing. I tried to copy his movements, but every time I do, it does seem like I am fighting, not dancing.

"No! Get it right! Gaara, please teach her how it's done."

He nodded and walked over to me. I tensed up when he walked behind me.

"Relax," he whispered. "This is why you seem like you're fighting. You are too tense around anyone who comes near you. If you do the fighting moves, but just relax around them, you'll be able to perform it."

**This is the best time to start your plan if you are going through with it.**

_I know that._

Even with that said, I couldn't relax. Not when he was basically whispering in my ear. I hadn't had a guy near me since Sasuke. And even then, our relationship was platonic. I resisted the urge to shake my head as I try to make sure I don't think about him.

Gaara, surprisingly gently, grabbed my arms, as I stiffen even more.

"In dancing you need trust," he had said. I slowly relaxed into his grip, as he made me dance, his hands making my arms do the move. He nodded; the closest thing I will get to approval, as he let my hands fall limp.

"Thank you, Gaara," I smiled at him. He blinked before responding.

"We're not done yet. Your legs need some work. They tend to move into real stances, but in this dance, we don't want simple leg work, we want complex ones."

I nodded at him, realizing that he was right. Every time I went into a particular part, the instructor would frown and say something about how I am such a simple girl.

"Perform it."

So I did. He stepped to a certain point and whenever I got there, I either bump into him or get too close for him or step on his foot. He didn't seem to mind, but each time I did bump into him, I would have to start from the top. Even when I didn't bump into him, and did it perfectly, he would say that we start from the top and that I have to get it right till I memorize it. Then, after about seven or eight times getting it right in a row, he would move on, step at another angle, and I would have to restart it.

The instructors had a look of approval, as Kakuzu watched us intently, as if searching for something. When he was satisfied, he walked off.

Gaara was starting to go to the more complex part, as I saw him lie down.

"I need you to be able to fly off your feet. You have to be graceful enough to capture the audience, but you have to jump high enough as well. Try practicing on me. Jump over me, as you graze the air with grace."

Bewildered, it took me a few minutes to realize what he was asking of me, as it was weird to see him willing to get his face stepped on. But I did it anyways. And I can tell that it did nothing to improve my grace. He would look unsatisfied whenever I jumped to high, tripped over him, went to fast, or anything that was under graceful.

When it was dark, the instructors clapped at my improvement, as Gaara still looked unsatisfied. I looked down on my feet, as I wondered how I was supposed to get closer if I didn't want too.

"Sakura," Kakuzu brought me out of my thoughts, "You did very well today. Not many hold well against these instructors. And I see I made a good choice of choosing Gaara."

"Thank you Kakuzu," I smiled at him. "It was tougher then usual, but the dancing is more familiar now because I have some experience in kendo, aikido, and quite a few others. Though I don't know what you mean by picking Gaara. Care to explain?"

Kakuzu nodded. He seemed to contemplate how to choose his words. "You needed a dancer your age, though you don't seem to trust any of the teenagers near you. I needed someone odd like Gaara, though someone who can either beat or match you experience in dancing. I had to find someone who would be different from others, so you could trust them easier in dance, and also someone who could force you to wander about outside your little secluded bubble. He was my choice because he drags people into his world quite easily, not to mention that he was going to your school. I needed you and him to get closer without me straying in too much."

I raised an eyebrow at him. "Aren't you telling me this interfering with this?"

He seemed to contemplate the idea, but shook the thought out of his head before replying. "No, it's not, once you finally got close to him."

"You seemed to be mistaken," I said carefully, "I am not close to him in any way besides as colleagues and classmates. Other than that, I am afraid that there are no traces of bonds anywhere."

Kakuzu rolled his eyes, which was quite a funny sight; because he always seemed so mature. "Don't deny what I see, Sakura. I have had to master psychology and human abilities. My father was a doctor, my mother was a scientist. I had to learn the works of the human minds. I know more about you then you think, Sakura. Just remember not to deny what you feel. I do care, Sakura, I truly do, but I need you to understand that I can't do anything if you choose to stay away from Gaara. But you need to choose someone to bond with quickly. Make a friend, a true one, and trust them completely, or you might hurt yourself. Please Sakura, realize that you are getting closer to people."

It took me a moment to think about it. I was getting closer to people, though I was still not attached to anyone. Besides Kakuzu of course, for I trusted him completely. Though the more I think about it, the more I had to wonder. I have been trying to push away everyone, and now I am trying to make them push away from me by getting closer to them. Was it alright to let them in and just stop this whole game of tag, or was I doing the right thing?

Was I just a coward who wanted to get away from people so I _myself_ won't hurt, or was I really being courageous and have been trying to make myself hurt by staying away from others? I thought about how it just seemed like I was saving them from hurting at my own cost, but now, was it saving me from the possibility of being hurt, with hurting them in the process. Was I just another cowardly fool who convinced herself that it was the best for them, or was I here for saving them the pain? Everything seemed to change for a second, as I was left to think.

Should I let them chase on, or should I stop it now? Should I wait until my one hundred days are over, should I let myself become closer to others, or should I end my life now to save both me and the others from possible pain?

Kakuzu didn't seem to realize this, but it seemed that he opened another, _dark_, possibility in my head. For now, I will seal away that thought, and hopefully, I wouldn't have to think of using that option ever.

For if I was courageous, I was not courageous enough to end my life, and if I was a coward, I would be too scared to end my life.

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><p><em>Day 17:<em>

_Coward or Hero_

_Life or Death_

_Sooner than I thought_

_I could open the Doors of Death_

_Sooner than I thought_

_But would I rather save myself_

_Or save them?_

_Or, is there yet, another choice?_

_Coward or Hero_

_Fool or Loyal_

_I am to choose my fate_

_But I am yet to scared_

_To make a choice quite yet_

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><p><strong>TO ALL GUEST REVIEWERS THAT HAVE VOTED ITASAKU: Okay, Guest reviewer. I guess you could call me suspicious the first time I got so many reviews from ItaSaku. I got suspicious on how so many Guest wanted ItaSaku on chapter 23, and none on the users part. I decided to add the votes anyways. And I am not stupid. I am not sure if you weren't aware, but I want this to be fair for the users and anonymous reviewers. Unlike you Anonymous reviewers, they can only review once, exactly why I am allowing them 2 points. Then I said you could have a name and allow 2 points if you have a name. I was suspicious about how so many guest reviewers wanted ItaSaku in the last chapter as well, and that's exactly why I am doing this to specifically Itachi, and not the rest. If I ever get suspicious again I am just going to make a poll on my page, so you anonymous reviewers can just stop spamming my email. Unfortunately, then others can't vote, and I enjoy seeing anonymous reviewers vote, just not when I get ten for the same pairing, constantly, especially when it's in the same hour. Heck, I got 18 in the same hour. So, now, I am going to make ItachixSakura, still a possibility, but the most they can earn in a chapter will be five from any anonymous reviewer. As for users, your vote will still count as two points, no matter how many users vote for it. By the way, if you want to know how I know it's in the same hour…I am ALWAYS on my email, even when my phone goes –ding! - When I get a new one. I was even thinking about banning ItaSaku, but I like them too much, so I added a chance for you guys. Still pretty pissed about how this will crush other votes though<strong>

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><p><strong>As for who gets the one-shot, it will be anyone but an anonymous reviewer, whoever reaches 250 reviews first. Why? Because I have A: no way to message you and B: well the ItaSaku fanatic reviewed so many times that it hit my goal in no time, and I want to be sure it's more fair than someone who reviews it more than once. I had to delete a lot of anonymous reviews that said the same thing (itasaku, update soon, update ASAP, love them etc. etc.)<strong>

**You can vote on my profile as a poll now, and since I feel bad about the ItaSaku thing, I will make the poll 3 points for each one. If I see another chapter where there is an anonymous reader voting for whatever pairing, trying to 'cheat' their votes, it would just go to default where Sakura gets no one. Oh and you can vote for that too, if you want. If you think it's fairer of Sakura to stay single till she dies, that is.**

**PeinSaku: 55 (Woah. I guess I should add some moments between them after a few days)**

**SasoSaku: 34 (C'mon guys! If you let them beat you, then I won't add too many moments between them and that tortures me too DX) (thank you ninjaneko13! You actually got a name! If I saw another anonymous reviewer without a name, I would have killed the screen! And sorry, but even as much as I want ramen [yum!] we have to see what the reviewers think though honestly I am hoping for SasoSaku or GaaSaku ;)**

**GaaSaku: 21 (slowly rising…vote for this to save GaaSaku! PLEASE! LOVE THE REDHEAD, CUTIE THAT WILL BE HERE FOR THE NEXT FEW CHAPTERS!)**

**DeiSaku: 12 (the following three weren't even in the poll xD but go ahead and vote for them, I'll think of something)**

**ItaSaku: 22 (I am not a nice person, so instead of giving the benefit of the doubt, I will be giving another chance to name yourself. I am slightly pissed because I don't want any of my reviewers, voting or encouraging, to not be thanked properly. I don't care if you want to be thanked. You should at least be acknowledged. I love all my reviewers, and I would hate to miss a single one. See first paragraph of this A/N)**

**Kisasaku: 3**

**Harem: 22**

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><p><strong>ATTENTION: I have set up a poll, and since anonymous reviewers seem to be taking advantage of being able to vote more than once, the poll will be 5 points each vote. Oh and I was thinking of something interesting. If you can come up with a legitimate reason for Sakura to end up with whoever (nothing like: he-she is so cute together! Or he is super hot!) and adds it to your review, I will allow two extra points (if you have a name that would be four points total. If you don't, it's 3) By legit reason, I mean how they would contribute to the story. (ex. Zetsu and Sakura have known each other for some unknown reason before. Why not, after showing her and Zetsu's past, show how much Zetsu knows about her, etc. etc.) Now think about this story and see if you can come up with a reason. I just found the thought entertaining if you readers actually have a reason for voting for the couple rather than you are shipping them. Now I find harem the hardest to find a reason, but if you can think of one, that's amazing!<strong>

**Review! And vote! (once… no need to spam my email. If I see that, I am just going to delete your review once it's down to five, anonymous reviewer. Though I do admire your support for ItaSaku. It took me forever to delete it until you have five for the last chapter. You had over 20, that's for sure)**


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